Question:
I got fed… mmmm… i’m so tired of cheap bread, cereal and rice… <sigh but today my roommate gave me a slice of pizza… <grin liah Um. Liah, are you eating enough? I know grains and rice have a lot of nutrients in them, but … :( Sorry to intrude, this just struck me like something out of David Copperfield, or the Simpsons. "Ahh… Sweet gruel!"
No… not right now… things are a bit too tight… i’m eating though which i consider to be a good thing and i usually get fed a couple of times on weekends liah I want to run away… (some song)
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I got fed… mmmm… i’m so tired of cheap bread, cereal and rice… <sigh but today my roommate gave me a slice of pizza… <grin liah
Um. Liah, are you eating enough? I know grains and rice have a lot of nutrients in them, but … :( Sorry to intrude, this just struck me like something out of David Copperfield, or the Simpsons. "Ahh… Sweet gruel!"
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elegy said: I got fed… mmmm… i’m so tired of cheap bread, cereal and rice… <sigh but today my roommate gave me a slice of pizza… <grin mmmmmm…… pizza…….
I’ve been down to one meal a day due to monetary circumstances or therefore lack of… and today i got two… cereal and pizza… yummm liah
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elegy said: I got fed… mmmm… i’m so tired of cheap bread, cereal and rice… <sigh but today my roommate gave me a slice of pizza… <grin mmmmmm…… pizza……. I’ve been down to one meal a day due to monetary circumstances or therefore lack of… and today i got two… cereal and pizza… yummm liah
I remember once, when I was in seminary, school was out and I was working at a summer job. But in the weeks between the dorm stopped serving meals, and my first paycheck, I was so poor I only allowed myself to eat one 25c potato knish each day. I was glad to see that paycheck!! — Our lives begin to end the day we are silent about things that matter. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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I got fed… mmmm… i’m so tired of cheap bread, cereal and rice… <sigh but today my roommate gave me a slice of pizza… <grin liah
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I spent a good portion of my therapy today talking about my father… and that’s what we plan on talking about next week too… I’m exhausted… but if i go to bed now i’ll wake up about 3am liah i’m unlike anyone you’ve ever not wanted to meet
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Dear Don Quixote, Write some more please. Rosena
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Dear Don Quixote, I too believe in all, because all is possible. But you took the brave step that seems impossible. Instead of letting the knowledge drive you to a frenzy of madness . . . you eat the sun. How? What is the secret of doing such an act, or (fearing to be misunderstood) is it only an act for the masculine spirit? Rosena
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I hope the medication helps, and you feel better, Darren.
Well, temporary relief was better than no relief. Thanks for writing, Sepideh! 
Darren.
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I am not doing all that well today. I guess that a number of stressors have come together at the same time, and given that I don’t have the cognitive ability to deal with them now, I will have to suffer with unfocused disillusionment (couldn’t think of a better term for it) for the next little bit. I hope that 2mg of lorazepam and reading something boring will calm me down. See you later. Darren.
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I am cleaning my house, catching up on laundry and being a good wife and mother type person, has anyone an apron I can borrow? My thoughts will remain serious and sensible all day, at least until hubby comes home from work. My goal is to not spend too much time here you people distract me. Linda <running around with gay abandon with her feather duster
Dusting? You’re dusting? Okay, vacuum the floors occasionally, but dusting? Only very, very ill people dust things. Ones with energy. Do you have obsessive-compulsive disorder? I know I was on about perversions, but flitting around with a feather duster? — The opinions given above may be mine. They might also just be what I feel like saying right now, okay?
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I am cleaning my house, catching up on laundry and being a good wife and mother type person, has anyone an apron I can borrow? My thoughts will remain serious and sensible all day, at least until hubby comes home from work. My goal is to not spend too much time here you people distract me. Linda <running around with gay abandon with her feather duster
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… I was driving my car, a 2000 Dodge Stratus, when I spotted a Stratus 2001 going along the same street as me. A complete new design. It is nice, I liked it. Then, I started thinking how it was that I seldom spotted any Stratus in the street at all. Then I jumped to think about how many car makes there are running in the street. And how you can go to a car boutique (not that I go to those shops myself, but I point it out to make my point) and there you can get almost anything you want for your car, whatever the make it is. Well, you sometimes have to figure out the right part or product, but it is not like with computers. Then I realised how strong grip has Bill Gates on us. If you do not like the Windows world, then what can you have? There is of course the Mac, which probably has not died already for its superior handling of graphics. Then there is the OS2, which is probably dead. And lastly you have LINUX, or more generally, UNIX. This last one is not really a piece of cake to fiddle with, so if you do not want to go into the trouble of becoming a configuration guru, you are left with only two choices: Windows and Mac. Mac has submitted greatly to Bill Gates, so if you buy one of the most popular of their computers, you can switch to the PC world any time. If you go to a software shop, you are bound to buy specific OS software. Bill Gates has made sure that the software for a PC doesn’t work in any other platform and that of the other platforms do not work with his. So, if you want Mac specific software you got to hunt specially for it, and it will never run in a Gates’ computer. Every time you buy almost anything for a computer, the bundled software has to work in a Bill’s machine, and he gets his share of the deal. Monopolistic little bastard, huh? What version of Office do you have? Me, 2000, but I haven’t tried it, I keep working with the 97. — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – … I was driving my car, a 2000 Dodge Stratus, when I spotted a Stratus 2001 going along the same street as me. A complete new design. It is nice, I liked it. Then, I started thinking how it was that I seldom spotted any Stratus in the street at all. Then I jumped to think about how many car makes there are running in the street. And how you can go to a car boutique (not that I go to those shops myself, but I point it out to make my point) and there you can get almost anything you want for your car, whatever the make it is. Well, you sometimes have to figure out the right part or product, but it is not like with computers. Then I realised how strong grip has Bill Gates on us. If you do not like the Windows world, then what can you have? There is of course the Mac, which probably has not died already for its superior handling of graphics. Then there is the OS2, which is probably dead. And lastly you have LINUX, or more generally, UNIX. This last one is not really a piece of cake to fiddle with, so if you do not want to go into the trouble of becoming a configuration guru, you are left with only two choices: Windows and Mac. Mac has submitted greatly to Bill Gates, so if you buy one of the most popular of their computers, you can switch to the PC world any time. If you go to a software shop, you are bound to buy specific OS software. Bill Gates has made sure that the software for a PC doesn’t work in any other platform and that of the other platforms do not work with his. So, if you want Mac specific software you got to hunt specially for it, and it will never run in a Gates’ computer. Every time you buy almost anything for a computer, the bundled software has to work in a Bill’s machine, and he gets his share of the deal. Monopolistic little bastard, huh? What version of Office do you have? Me, 2000, but I haven’t tried it, I keep working with the 97. — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial I use Corel WordPerfect.
World perfect is nice. Well, at least up to the version 6.0 it was pretty good for my taste. Then I lost track, because I always bump upon the most recent version of Office, Urghh! — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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Monopolistic little bastard, huh?
Of course. But that’s okay now according to our courts. One judge actually had enough balls to say what was painfully obvious to everybody in the world — Microsoft sucks. But another judge (and probably a big Microsoft shareholder) thought the first judge was a big meanie so the right thing to do is to let Microsoft keep their monopoly. Awww… isn’t that sweet. R
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Monopolistic little bastard, huh? Of course. But that’s okay now according to our courts. One judge actually had enough balls to say what was painfully obvious to everybody in the world — Microsoft sucks. But another judge (and probably a big Microsoft shareholder) thought the first judge was a big meanie so the right thing to do is to let Microsoft keep their monopoly. Awww… isn’t that sweet.
Quite. And Windows sucks. Every time my system freezes I have to put up with it, because I do not have any other choice. It has been too common a practice to swear in the name of the little monopolist sucker’s mother when the bloody Windows just goes down by obscure reasons. Bill gates is now so powerful that he has more money than most of the countries in the world, but a few (I do not have the figures to back this up, so, if you do not agree, just point it to me, do not expect a proof). What do you think would happen if you were so smart as to have a better OS than the sucker Windows? You bet you would be wiped out as an Autumn leave (now I am getting poetic, huh?) — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – What version of Office do you have? Me, 2000, but I haven’t tried it, I keep working with the 97. I have 2000 but I use 97 (if it ain’t broken, don’t fix it) Of course you realise that MS have shot themselves in the foot with active authentication. People who’ve bought Office XP can’t get through to register their unique hardware generated number and therefore in a few weeks, all their apps will stop working. Good job there’s a crack available already. Unless MS change their attitude, I can see people shifting across to Linux, especially as a few of the big boys are now getting involved in producing a user friendlier product. PC manufactures have already started offering Linux as an alternative, and only this week two of the UK’s big independents have announced that they too are shipping pc’s with an option of either MS or Linux, and in doing so offering significant reductions for the latter.
I guess LINUX has not had a much impact for personal computers because the OS is designed to work for a work station and not a P(ersonal)C(computer). In the old days where the OS’s were devised there was not much hope that the regular household dweller could have access to a computer at home. UNIX, if I understand well, was thought as a solution for having several terminals connected to a central computer, rather than many individual computers connected together. Part of the trick which made Bill Gates so successful was precisely to devise the concept of a personal machine. The architecture of a PC is now far anachronic because the handling of the memory. In those times, they thought that you could never achieve in all history of mankind, handling amounts of RAM memory above some hundreds of KB. This problem is not present for the UNIX architecture, so I guess UNIX running in a machine with a PC BIOS is unnatural (Or I am pissing out of the bowl? I write what I think I know, but you are invited to correct me anytime). In any case, I am glad there are some signs of relief from this tyranny of Bill Gates. I guess everybody is fed up of him, right? — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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Thanks, Grovel, I am enjoying all what you have to say. There is only one thing I do not know about. What is Win and Office XP? — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Part of the trick which made Bill Gates so successful was precisely to devise the concept of a personal machine. What Bill Gates did was gather various components and bundle them altogether so that those people tinkering with the whole idea of personal/small business computing (the alternative wasn’t viable, affordable or at all friendly) could get their machine up and running out of the box from day one. Most of Microsoft’s software (excluding ms basic, but even that wasn’t written from scratch) to this day is an evolution of what was originally bought and therefore written by the likes of Digital Research, Mac, IBM and half a dozen other publishers (windows was bought/borrowed from the likes of Mac and Gem, NT was bought in, parts of IBM’s Warp was backward engineered and borrowed from etc). Where he really scored is not so much the quality or content of programs, it has more to do with brilliant marketing and being in the right place at the right time. The architecture of a PC is now far anachronic because the handling of the memory. Absolutely. Dos was written to handle a ceiling of 512k because at the time 1mb of ram (circa 1980) would have cost thousands and thousands and it was thought that no one could possibly want more. Better memory management in Dos 3.3 (I think it was 3.3) meant you could run extended and expanded up to 1204 and 2048k, but it was inefficient and clunky, whereas the others: one, didn’t need the physical memory and two, if they did, handled it better anyway. Even up until win98 memory handling could be traced back to early dos. This problem is not present for the UNIX architecture, so I guess UNIX running in a machine with a PC BIOS is unnatural I’m not familiar with sun solaris, alpha or posix so I don’t really know. All I do know is UNIX seems way more efficient, a lot less demanding and far more stable when networking. In any case, I am glad there are some signs of relief from this tyranny of Bill Gates. I guess everybody is fed up of him, right? The majority of computer users know no different and there’s no reason why they should. For the home user, windows is all most people will ever get to use, so they don’t get to compare it to the competition. As far as operating systems and computing in general goes, Microsoft and Intel have done more to strangle and retard the industry than is really acceptable. We’re still running on cisc based processors which in turn are totally inefficient, power hungry, slow and run hot. Win98 and ME are atrocious systems with zero stability/realibity. NT/win200 is a far better system, but it’s bloat-ware, expensive (around two thousand bucks for advance server), and isn’t as stable. On the plus side it has a friendly interface, is easy to install and is hardware supported. Should one of the Linux/Unix FreeBSD publishers get around a few of the teething problems such as easier installation, better driver support and more software available – then with the advent of MS XP, it will do to Microsoft what Microsoft did to IBM. Bring back dos
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Guess who isn’t going to upgrade…
Ditto. I’d go back to a Commodore 64 before I ever upgrade a microsoft operating system again.
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Guess who isn’t going to upgrade… Ditto. I’d go back to a Commodore 64 before I ever upgrade a microsoft operating system again.
There was a bit of a learning curve that I had to undertake for Me when I got my new comp, the fact of which kind of depressed me. In alt.windows-me, they always recommend a "clean install", but that seems to be a bit of a pain in the ass when you consider that you’ve paid good money to buy a new OS upgrade. I am "thinking" of trying Windows XP this October when it’s supposed to be released, but the jury is still out on that idea. Darren.
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Thanks, Grovel, I am enjoying all what you have to say. There is only one thing I do not know about. What is Win and Office XP? XP is Microsoft’s attempt at getting people to stop ripping off their software. When you install Windows or Office XP, what it does is access the peripherals such as sound card, video card, capture card and using an algorithm – generate a UIN (Unique Identifier Number) it generates a multi digit number unique to your machine only. You then have to connect to Microsoft’s web site or phone their XP hot line and quote your UIN. What will then happen is MS will issue you with a number based on your UIN, you then have 30 days upon which to enter your personal serial number. Failure to do so will result in your software (even though you bought it for hundreds of bucks at your local computer shop), your software will disable itself and render itself useless. The problem is that XP relies on what hardware you have, so as soon as you upgrade a soundcard or a videocard, your operating system/office XP disables itself until you contact MS again and get issued with another new password. You are then allowed 3 more calls to microsoft, then after that you pay.
This sucks. I have some software which works this way (Mathematica by Wolfram Research). But on the bright side of things, what has Win XP to offer to convince us to upgrade? I certainly need to have a HUGE lot of reasons not to remain suffering my Win ME. But of course, Bill Gates, will see that every new computer comes bundled with the new piece of crap, huh? — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – What version of Office do you have? Me, 2000, but I haven’t tried it, I keep working with the 97. I have 2000 but I use 97 (if it ain’t broken, don’t fix it) Of course you realise that MS have shot themselves in the foot with active authentication. People who’ve bought Office XP can’t get through to register their unique hardware generated number and therefore in a few weeks, all their apps will stop working. Good job there’s a crack available already. Unless MS change their attitude, I can see people shifting across to Linux, especially as a few of the big boys are now getting involved in producing a user friendlier product. PC manufactures have already started offering Linux as an alternative, and only this week two of the UK’s big independents have announced that they too are shipping pc’s with an option of either MS or Linux, and in doing so offering significant reductions for the latter. I guess LINUX has not had a much impact for personal computers because the OS is designed to work for a work station and not a
P(ersonal)C(computer). – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – In the old days where the OS’s were devised there was not much hope that the regular household dweller could have access to a computer at home. UNIX, if I understand well, was thought as a solution for having several terminals connected to a central computer, rather than many individual computers connected together. Part of the trick which made Bill Gates so successful was precisely to devise the concept of a personal machine. The architecture of a PC is now far anachronic because the handling of the memory. In those times, they thought that you could never achieve in all history of mankind, handling amounts of RAM memory above some hundreds of KB. This problem is not present for the UNIX architecture, so I guess UNIX running in a machine with a PC BIOS is unnatural (Or I am pissing out of the bowl? I write what I think I know, but you are invited to correct me anytime). In any case, I am glad there are some signs of relief from this tyranny of Bill Gates. I guess everybody is fed up of him, right? You mean the basic input output system of the motherboard ?.
Yep I do. But, as I said, I might be pissing out of the bowl, because I have not a clear idea of how the OS relates to it. I do not like intrusive software.
In my new PC, I have 60 Gig of space. Sometimes I think of creating two partitions and installing LINUX in one of them. I have not carried on with it, because I am afraid of getting trapped in the UNIX world and become addicted. On the other hand, I have not right now any other computers to play with as a system administrator, but my old Pentium III. — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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Now you’re making me nostalgic for the good old days. Actually I wrote my very first program on a Vic-20, a unique experience to say the least. I very nearly trashed my TV with my Vic-20. Not because it did the TV any damage, it’s just that programming the damn thing was so bloody frustrating, and on more than one occasion I threw it across the room at the TV.
In fact, I first learned to program on a Vic-20. The first night I had it I knew I was hooked for life. I had bought the Vic-20, a cassette player, and a beginner’s course on BASIC. 8 hours or so after I took it all out of the boxes, I had the beginnings of my first program written already.
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Boy my ball’s swelled up on that one. OW! No it was a good thing, bright and shinny!
The shin is too close to the knee for that to likely be very good!
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Boy my ball’s swelled up on that one.
OW!
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My big upgrade adventure this year was moving from Win95 to Win98SE, and I
only did it because I wanted FireWire and [reliable] USB support. My other big adventure involved learning to use Partition Magic. Good clean
fun. My next big upgrade is going to be when I chuck all of this Micro$lop crap into a big bonfire and get myself a linux box.
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Ditto. I’d go back to a Commodore 64 before I ever upgrade a microsoft operating system again. Arrrrrgh…. I spent 3 days solid programming on a 64 just to get a frog to hop across the screen. Poke, goto, peek etc.
Now you’re making me nostalgic for the good old days. Actually I wrote my very first program on a Vic-20, a unique experience to say the least.
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – This sucks. I have some software which works this way (Mathematica by Wolfram Research). But on the bright side of things, what has Win XP to offer to convince us to upgrade? People think that the latest version of something must be better than the previous version. There’s also a snobbery value associated with the computing nouveau where bandying about the fact that your machine is a 7 trillionhertz 6 tetabites wintel running the *latest* operating system means that no doubt some people will buy into it. I certainly need to have a HUGE lot of reasons not to remain suffering my Win ME. MS customer support reported that win ME has tripled the amount of calls into their help desk. But of course, Bill Gates, will see that every new computer comes bundled with the new piece of crap, huh? I don’t know. I cartainly think he’ll suffer because of MS’s attitude. New computers are really cut throat on prices these days and so the aftermarket upgrade option has come to be more important than it was a few years back. But if MS is going to make upgrading a labourious and piddling task, more and more computer manufacturers are going to shy away from microsoft and shift across to Linux of something like BeOS or FreeBSD.
I keep on asking; what are BeOS and FreeBSD? — Teilhard The Extraterrestrial
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Yes and I have the 16k add on memory! Also have a 4" thermal printer. It used a cassette recorder to load programs and a black and white T.V. for the monitor. Every time you pressed a key the screen blinked! I remember that. I also remember loading programs up from tape and it taking forever and there would always be something that would go wrong.
heh. I’d like to be able to say that the later spectrums fixed that.. but they didn’t! my 128PLUS spectrum was just the same! — Laz Spashett "yes, I’m mentally ill. No, I’m not stupid or dangerous. which part of the above did you not understand?"
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{{{big fluffy warm fuzzy hug}}} congrats on the week and I hope you do go out and have fun. Right on about not letting anyone drag you down. Best wishes, posted and mailed ICQ # 1812772 – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hey. I went on the ‘net today. Someone reading this newsgroup sent me a really nice card to say they where thinking of me. Thankyou whoever sent it. I also got a really cool present in the post It’s also been a week since a last injured myself in anyway. Woo! I may go out (even though the outside is scary) later and celebrate. Today’s been quite cool. Thankyou people in ASD for help me enjoy it. I love you all. Three PS My mum is in a bad mood, I’m trying hard to to let this ruin things.
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Hey. I went on the ‘net today. Someone reading this newsgroup sent me a really nice card to say they where thinking of me. Thankyou whoever sent it. I also got a really cool present in the post It’s also been a week since a last injured myself in anyway. Woo! I may go out (even though the outside is scary) later and celebrate. Today’s been quite cool. Thankyou people in ASD for help me enjoy it. I love you all. Three PS My mum is in a bad mood, I’m trying hard to to let this ruin things.
Three, sweetie, I wonder if there is a connection between the fact that you’ve had a cool day today and that your mum is in a bad mood. Like, at times when you are happy does it seem to set her in a bad mood, and when you are down does she seem to be in a more pleasant mood? I had some experiences with my own mother that were like that. A couple spring to mind, but I want to focus a little on you, so won’t go into details. Suffice to say that with the benefit of hindsight I feel that my mother could have been jealous of or threatened by the fact that I didn’t depend exclusively upon her for my happiness, so she felt a need to damage the happiness. This is not to blame you or your mother if this scenario sounds familiar to you. Now that I’m a mum myself I realize how hard it can be to let go someone whom you love so deeply and for so long. If this is the kind of pain that is working on your mum, she likely isn’t even aware of it. But you need to know that it is *her* problem to deal with, and not *yours*. Your problem, and I’m glad to see from your post that you are working on it, is not to let her problems hurt *you*. Slightly off topic at this point, but I’ve said it in another post, and I repeat it here, I was curious so visited your photo, and I think you are a cute guy. I’d be happy to have you hanging around with my son. Tara Ballance Montreal, Camada
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I shall be studying. Thoughts of chocolate,sex, panties, coconuts, inflatable footballs and vibrating household appliances will be banished from my mind. Linda Does that include Chicken Kiev and macaroni and cheese too?
Definately, the only thoughts in my mind are regarding study, and wombles, especially those wombles that weeble Linda – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Aware1 — popped fresh out of a toaster of course. — Toto… I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.
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I shall be studying. Thoughts of chocolate,sex, panties, coconuts, inflatable footballs and vibrating household appliances will be banished from my mind. Linda Does that include Chicken Kiev and macaroni and cheese too? Aware1 — popped fresh out of a toaster of course.
I love it when you’re all hot and fluffy. You’re better than poptarts. Ed
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I shall be studying. Thoughts of chocolate,sex, panties, coconuts, inflatable footballs and vibrating household appliances will be banished from my mind. Linda
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I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry.
When I was little and I used to feel sad but couldn’t cry, I’d think of the saddest thing I could think of, like when my Pop died. Then I wouldn’t be able to stop the tears and it was a huge release. Amy
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nighty-night. <tuck, tuck ~K
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Thanks, K. I like talkin’ to you, too. Goin’ to try to sleep now…it’s only 9 pm here, but I think that with sleep everything might seema bit better…long as I can forget I have to go to work tomorrow. Gnight…happy paper writing. !!!~~~ggggoooddddd~~~!!!! glad i could help–ya know i like talkin’ to ya. ~K Yeah…I might do some net searching, at least, when I have the time. That’s not a bad idea. Heh…I almost wish I could thwack the student, but as it is, I’ll have to just deal with her father, who thinks his little girl can do no wrong. Flatland, eh? Never read it…never heard of it. Hope it was at least good enough to make the paper relatively easy to write. Incidentally, I’m feeling a little bit better. Thanks, K. hmmm a natural. Wiccan is right and i think you would be interested to do some net searching or read the book the Spiral Dance by Starhawk. if nothing, it’s a great read, but it is central to how wicca evolved. And yeah, the kids are rebellious buggers–i was rasied this way. Aw, if i was in your class i thwack that student on their punkin’ haid. accordingto them, i created hell! (LMAO of course) ~K, who is writing a thesis paper on the book Flatland I’m actually fascinated by the whole concept. My belief system is a combination of a lot of things…appreciation for nature being one of them. I’ve known people who are Wiccan (is that right?), and so know a bit about it. I think the thing that’s cool about it is that it recalls such ancient beliefs in the power of the seasons and the cycles of the sun and moon. Like I said, though, I just know a little. Some of my students are even Wiccan, though I don’t really know how far they carry it…I think with them it’s just a rebellion thing more than an actual faith, if that makes sense. Class is going terribly…thanks for asking, though. I have this one student who is going to drive me to a complete nervous breakdown, as if I wasn’t well on that path to begin with. How are things with you? Ugh…televangelists…according to them, I’d be in hell three hundred times over, already. !!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going? Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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Thanks, K. I like talkin’ to you, too. Goin’ to try to sleep now…it’s only 9 pm here, but I think that with sleep everything might seema bit better…long as I can forget I have to go to work tomorrow. Gnight…happy paper writing.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – !!!~~~ggggoooddddd~~~!!!! glad i could help–ya know i like talkin’ to ya. ~K Yeah…I might do some net searching, at least, when I have the time. That’s not a bad idea. Heh…I almost wish I could thwack the student, but as it is, I’ll have to just deal with her father, who thinks his little girl can do no wrong. Flatland, eh? Never read it…never heard of it. Hope it was at least good enough to make the paper relatively easy to write. Incidentally, I’m feeling a little bit better. Thanks, K. hmmm a natural. Wiccan is right and i think you would be interested to do some net searching or read the book the Spiral Dance by Starhawk. if nothing, it’s a great read, but it is central to how wicca evolved. And yeah, the kids are rebellious buggers–i was rasied this way. Aw, if i was in your class i thwack that student on their punkin’ haid. accordingto them, i created hell! (LMAO of course) ~K, who is writing a thesis paper on the book Flatland I’m actually fascinated by the whole concept. My belief system is a combination of a lot of things…appreciation for nature being one of them. I’ve known people who are Wiccan (is that right?), and so know a bit about it. I think the thing that’s cool about it is that it recalls such ancient beliefs in the power of the seasons and the cycles of the sun and moon. Like I said, though, I just know a little. Some of my students are even Wiccan, though I don’t really know how far they carry it…I think with them it’s just a rebellion thing more than an actual faith, if that makes sense. Class is going terribly…thanks for asking, though. I have this one student who is going to drive me to a complete nervous breakdown, as if I wasn’t well on that path to begin with. How are things with you? Ugh…televangelists…according to them, I’d be in hell three hundred times over, already. !!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going? Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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!!!~~~ggggoooddddd~~~!!!! glad i could help–ya know i like talkin’ to ya. ~K
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Yeah…I might do some net searching, at least, when I have the time. That’s not a bad idea. Heh…I almost wish I could thwack the student, but as it is, I’ll have to just deal with her father, who thinks his little girl can do no wrong. Flatland, eh? Never read it…never heard of it. Hope it was at least good enough to make the paper relatively easy to write. Incidentally, I’m feeling a little bit better. Thanks, K. hmmm a natural. Wiccan is right and i think you would be interested to do some net searching or read the book the Spiral Dance by Starhawk. if nothing, it’s a great read, but it is central to how wicca evolved. And yeah, the kids are rebellious buggers–i was rasied this way. Aw, if i was in your class i thwack that student on their punkin’ haid. accordingto them, i created hell! (LMAO of course) ~K, who is writing a thesis paper on the book Flatland I’m actually fascinated by the whole concept. My belief system is a combination of a lot of things…appreciation for nature being one of them. I’ve known people who are Wiccan (is that right?), and so know a bit about it. I think the thing that’s cool about it is that it recalls such ancient beliefs in the power of the seasons and the cycles of the sun and moon. Like I said, though, I just know a little. Some of my students are even Wiccan, though I don’t really know how far they carry it…I think with them it’s just a rebellion thing more than an actual faith, if that makes sense. Class is going terribly…thanks for asking, though. I have this one student who is going to drive me to a complete nervous breakdown, as if I wasn’t well on that path to begin with. How are things with you? Ugh…televangelists…according to them, I’d be in hell three hundred times over, already. !!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going? Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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Yeah…I might do some net searching, at least, when I have the time. That’s not a bad idea. Heh…I almost wish I could thwack the student, but as it is, I’ll have to just deal with her father, who thinks his little girl can do no wrong. Flatland, eh? Never read it…never heard of it. Hope it was at least good enough to make the paper relatively easy to write. Incidentally, I’m feeling a little bit better. Thanks, K.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – hmmm a natural. Wiccan is right and i think you would be interested to do some net searching or read the book the Spiral Dance by Starhawk. if nothing, it’s a great read, but it is central to how wicca evolved. And yeah, the kids are rebellious buggers–i was rasied this way. Aw, if i was in your class i thwack that student on their punkin’ haid. accordingto them, i created hell! (LMAO of course) ~K, who is writing a thesis paper on the book Flatland I’m actually fascinated by the whole concept. My belief system is a combination of a lot of things…appreciation for nature being one of them. I’ve known people who are Wiccan (is that right?), and so know a bit about it. I think the thing that’s cool about it is that it recalls such ancient beliefs in the power of the seasons and the cycles of the sun and moon. Like I said, though, I just know a little. Some of my students are even Wiccan, though I don’t really know how far they carry it…I think with them it’s just a rebellion thing more than an actual faith, if that makes sense. Class is going terribly…thanks for asking, though. I have this one student who is going to drive me to a complete nervous breakdown, as if I wasn’t well on that path to begin with. How are things with you? Ugh…televangelists…according to them, I’d be in hell three hundred times over, already. !!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going? Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. When I was little and I used to feel sad but couldn’t cry, I’d think of the saddest thing I could think of, like when my Pop died. Then I wouldn’t be able to stop the tears and it was a huge release. Amy
Yeah…maybe now that I’ve gotten some of my work done, I can sit down and have a good cry…maybe not, though. I’ve been trying most of the afternoon and evening. I used to do that, too. Think of something sad…then all the sad things just kind of well up and at last the tears flow. Thanks, Amy. I might try it. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –
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hmmm a natural. Wiccan is right and i think you would be interested to do some net searching or read the book the Spiral Dance by Starhawk. if nothing, it’s a great read, but it is central to how wicca evolved. And yeah, the kids are rebellious buggers–i was rasied this way. Aw, if i was in your class i thwack that student on their punkin’ haid. accordingto them, i created hell! (LMAO of course) ~K, who is writing a thesis paper on the book Flatland
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’m actually fascinated by the whole concept. My belief system is a combination of a lot of things…appreciation for nature being one of them. I’ve known people who are Wiccan (is that right?), and so know a bit about it. I think the thing that’s cool about it is that it recalls such ancient beliefs in the power of the seasons and the cycles of the sun and moon. Like I said, though, I just know a little. Some of my students are even Wiccan, though I don’t really know how far they carry it…I think with them it’s just a rebellion thing more than an actual faith, if that makes sense. Class is going terribly…thanks for asking, though. I have this one student who is going to drive me to a complete nervous breakdown, as if I wasn’t well on that path to begin with. How are things with you? Ugh…televangelists…according to them, I’d be in hell three hundred times over, already. !!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going? Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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I’m actually fascinated by the whole concept. My belief system is a combination of a lot of things…appreciation for nature being one of them. I’ve known people who are Wiccan (is that right?), and so know a bit about it. I think the thing that’s cool about it is that it recalls such ancient beliefs in the power of the seasons and the cycles of the sun and moon. Like I said, though, I just know a little. Some of my students are even Wiccan, though I don’t really know how far they carry it…I think with them it’s just a rebellion thing more than an actual faith, if that makes sense. Class is going terribly…thanks for asking, though. I have this one student who is going to drive me to a complete nervous breakdown, as if I wasn’t well on that path to begin with. How are things with you? Ugh…televangelists…according to them, I’d be in hell three hundred times over, already.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – !!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going? Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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!!! sombody who actually knows something!!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find people who actually know what wicca is? glad i talked–i live in a very high concentration of churches and a huge televangelist lives in our city, so every other nights it’s "ban and burn the sinners" grrrrrrr. it is a celebration of nature and dual concepts of male and female energy, along with the natural passing of the seasons. you are rare, ya know? you actually know the truth about wicca. ~K, who is willing to give hugs anytime oh—–duh. how is class going?
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
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Have you, really? That seems so backward to me, that people would still feel the need to persecute you for your beliefs like that. I’m sorry that you have been threatened in that way. Yeah…I know a little bit about Wicca, though admittedly not much. I do know that satanism is very far removed from it…essentially, Wicca is a celebration of the power of nature, no? maybe I’m wrong. Thanks, K, and hugs back to you, too.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – i am a practicing wicca, and yes, i have been threated with that. It’s so frightening some times. I can relate with reading the crucible. and FYI, Wicca is not witchcraft as in satanist, which does not exist to us. Now i will get off my soap box. ((((((((((((((((visible))))))))))))))))))) sometimes we just need to talk, no? ~K, woh understands the visible girl K, Are you saying that there are people who practice witchcraft, who are in danger of something like that? I suppose so…never thought of it. Wrapped in my own little world, as usual, where my students are getting ready to read "The Crucible", all about the witch trials. If that’s not what you meant, I’m sorry. I’m just an idiot sometimes. there are those of us for who the torture you described could very likely still be enforced. Sometimes i go in fear of my fellow human beings, sometimes i go not at all. ~K, who knows she has made now damn sense I sicken myself. I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. I feel ill…stomach in knots…I feel like one of those people accused of witchcraft in the sixteen hundreds…to kill them, they would pile stones on them until they broke and died. I can’t take this pressure anymore…I’m so close to breaking. Other than that, I have nothing to say.
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I sicken myself. I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. I feel ill…stomach in knots…I feel like one of those people accused of witchcraft in the sixteen hundreds…to kill them, they would pile stones on them until they broke and died. I can’t take this pressure anymore…I’m so close to breaking. Other than that, I have nothing to say. {{{{{invisible}}}}}
Thank you, Eric. Those hugs are appreciated and definitely needed. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – — eric "live fast, die only if strictly necessary"
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i am a practicing wicca, and yes, i have been threated with that. It’s so frightening some times. I can relate with reading the crucible. and FYI, Wicca is not witchcraft as in satanist, which does not exist to us. Now i will get off my soap box. ((((((((((((((((visible))))))))))))))))))) sometimes we just need to talk, no? ~K, woh understands the visible girl
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – K, Are you saying that there are people who practice witchcraft, who are in danger of something like that? I suppose so…never thought of it. Wrapped in my own little world, as usual, where my students are getting ready to read "The Crucible", all about the witch trials. If that’s not what you meant, I’m sorry. I’m just an idiot sometimes. there are those of us for who the torture you described could very likely still be enforced. Sometimes i go in fear of my fellow human beings, sometimes i go not at all. ~K, who knows she has made now damn sense I sicken myself. I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. I feel ill…stomach in knots…I feel like one of those people accused of witchcraft in the sixteen hundreds…to kill them, they would pile stones on them until they broke and died. I can’t take this pressure anymore…I’m so close to breaking. Other than that, I have nothing to say.
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there are those of us for who the torture you described could very likely still be enforced. Sometimes i go in fear of my fellow human beings, sometimes i go not at all. ~K, who knows she has made now damn sense
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I sicken myself. I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. I feel ill…stomach in knots…I feel like one of those people accused of witchcraft in the sixteen hundreds…to kill them, they would pile stones on them until they broke and died. I can’t take this pressure anymore…I’m so close to breaking. Other than that, I have nothing to say.
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K, Are you saying that there are people who practice witchcraft, who are in danger of something like that? I suppose so…never thought of it. Wrapped in my own little world, as usual, where my students are getting ready to read "The Crucible", all about the witch trials. If that’s not what you meant, I’m sorry. I’m just an idiot sometimes.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – there are those of us for who the torture you described could very likely still be enforced. Sometimes i go in fear of my fellow human beings, sometimes i go not at all. ~K, who knows she has made now damn sense I sicken myself. I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. I feel ill…stomach in knots…I feel like one of those people accused of witchcraft in the sixteen hundreds…to kill them, they would pile stones on them until they broke and died. I can’t take this pressure anymore…I’m so close to breaking. Other than that, I have nothing to say.
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I sicken myself. I feel those tears bubbling so close to the surface, but I can’t cry. I feel ill…stomach in knots…I feel like one of those people accused of witchcraft in the sixteen hundreds…to kill them, they would pile stones on them until they broke and died. I can’t take this pressure anymore…I’m so close to breaking. Other than that, I have nothing to say.
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Liah, I think I speak for the vast majority of the group when I say these things: I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU! YAY LAIH! And… YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY! =^o^= P.S. I’m in a good mood, so I’m a little giddy. But I am sincere, even though I’m being silly. Kahnadah
Dear Kahnada I liked this. Thanks to you and your silly mood. =) liah still uppish Sometimes fame is just a matter of dying at the right time. —Unknown
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Liah, I think I speak for the vast majority of the group when I say these things: I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU! YAY LAIH! And… YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY! =^o^= P.S. I’m in a good mood, so I’m a little giddy. But I am sincere, even though I’m being silly. Kahnadah
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – was wonderful. Ask me about it. I’m exhausted now though. liah content May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you’re dead. —Irish proverb
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was wonderful. Ask me about it. I’m exhausted now though. liah content May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you’re dead. —Irish proverb
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x-no-archive:yes Good morning, everybody.
Good morning Skorch, Can you please pass over that good feeling? Thank you, Mary Beth
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – x-no-archive:yes I have the day. I am awake. I have energy. And I can do with it what I want. Didn’t start great. I had/have a disagreement over a post of mine with another ASD-er. 
But nothing debilitating, I hope. I feeling new, as if last night was good for me. I went out. Came home. Went to bed. And slept. Like a NORMAL PERSON. And I got up. IN THE MORNING. How strange. How unexpected. How nice. Good morning, everybody. -Skorch ^,,^<
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – -well as long as you’re happy , -that’s all that matters isin’t it ? Who said I was happy? you did , you’re gald you’re sober , glad , happy , samething -as i look around at my , -employed , well maintained , over loaded with posessions life , Well fucking goody for you, Dave. and i owe it all to drinking alcohol -i raise my glass of wine and say , -here’s to you Chimera , and all your happiness Drink up, Dave. Ask me if I give a shit. why would i ask that ? — chimera: learned a lot, a lot to learn yeah, i’m obnoxious and i snore, too. gotta problem with it?
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well as long as you’re happy , that’s all that matters isin’t it ? as i look around at my , employed , well maintained , over loaded with posessions life , i raise my glass of wine and say , here’s to you Chimera , and all your happiness – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Yeah, Dave, at least I’m still fucking sober. And fucking glad about it too. — chimera: learned a lot, a lot to learn yeah, i’m obnoxious and i snore, too. gotta problem with it?
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… I confess to my therapist that I cannot handle things anymore. I’ll tell her about life events she dosen’t know about (told one on the phone yesterday).
yea but , at least you’re sober If I knew of any decent supported-living arrangements, I’d be planning to move into one ASAP. There’s little to nothing available for a person as functional <hah! as I am. I pay bills, I do my own shopping, I get dressed every day — "too functional" for further assistance.
yea but , at least you’re sober Working is out of the question. At this point, school probably is, too.
well of course I’m not sure what did me in the worst. The financial struggle or isolation and abandonment. It dosen’t matter now.
that’s right , but , at leastyou’re still sober – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text — chimera: learned a lot, a lot to learn yeah, i’m obnoxious and i snore, too. gotta problem with it?
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I was layed up in bed all morning. It felt like there was a huge wieght pinning me to the bed. I just couldnt move! I have never felt anything like this before. It was wierd. Anyone else experienced this sort of thing? ?
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That doesn’t happen to you *every* morning? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I was layed up in bed all morning. It felt like there was a huge wieght pinning me to the bed. I just couldnt move! I have never felt anything like this before. It was wierd. Anyone else experienced this sort of thing? ?
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I was layed up in bed all morning. It felt like there was a huge wieght pinning me to the bed. I just couldnt move! I have never felt anything like this before. It was wierd. Anyone else experienced this sort of thing?
Oh gosh yes. Like I’m covered in bags of sand. Bruce.
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i wish it even more when i look at my children. all they are in for is a life of pain,just like i am. kids are sucking the life right out of me. marylou – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – x-no-archive: yes I would give anything to fall off the face of the earth. To cease to exist. To be no more. Missy Look at your child when you want to say that. Sincerely, Guy "We has met th’ enemy, an’ he is us." — Pogo Possum
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(((((((((((((((((((((((Missy)))))))))))))))))))))))) -Mike
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I would give anything to fall off the face of the earth. To cease to exist. To be no more. Missy — Believe that life is worth living and your belief will create the fact. William James http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/fields/8132
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{{{{{Mary Beth}}}}}
Thanks Bear, temporary insanity. Mary Beth
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today I had to go to my high school after 19 years to sign some
forms. I hope you are feeling better. You sure had a hard day. Orion The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. Walden * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!
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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – today I had to go to my high school after 19 years to sign some forms. I walked in and started down the hall. As I walked and stared, wide eyed, I felt like I was somewhere else in the universe but it had a familiarity to it. I see the walls, the floor, the classrooms, then Conference room A as it used to be known now painted black with children’s paintings but still carpeted like it was and at a slant so if someone was on the floor behind the last seats and you walk by no-one could see you and a man was sitting there and I stopped, he looked at me and I looked back and said nothing. As I continued down the hall, they turned shades of gray as I started approaching them, walking faster and faster to the office. I sign, I walk through the school, wandering around staring and back out the school where I jump in my car and take off to the highway and faster and faster I go as I am on the highway with the music on full blast so the bass would vibrate my seat. I am not in that car, someone else is driving for me and I am outside with the wind blowing across my cheeks so the tear runs slowly down running for my life. As dark clouds gather round me and sun beating on my face fingernails shiny painted this morning in blood red. I feel something but don’t know what that is sorta blank as the lights come flying behind me red flashing look down 83 but I don’t slow down because I have to run. Point a finger at me and pass by to the scene ahead of broken glass and shattered metal as I pass I realize it was put there on purpose to remind me it is me. And as I realize I am going the wrong way when I pass the light that is red and a horn blaring in through my mind I turn around and dare anyone to stop me or get in my way so I get home and lock the door and go and throw up. Mary Beth
So was it good? I’m sorry MB. Sounds like a really rough day… Take care… — "I do not know" – GlennT Trying to learn.. http://people.A2000.nl/gthomas/GlennHome.htm
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{{{{{Mary Beth}}}}} — _ bear _.-’ ) (_ . ‘ __ ___^/` _) (__. ’–. /_ /`-._/ (__/
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today I had to go to my high school after 19 years to sign some forms. I walked in and started down the hall. As I walked and stared, wide eyed, I felt like I was somewhere else in the universe but it had a familiarity to it. I see the walls, the floor, the classrooms, then Conference room A as it used to be known now painted black with children’s paintings but still carpeted like it was and at a slant so if someone was on the floor behind the last seats and you walk by no-one could see you and a man was sitting there and I stopped, he looked at me and I looked back and said nothing. As I continued down the hall, they turned shades of gray as I started approaching them, walking faster and faster to the office. I sign, I walk through the school, wandering around staring and back out the school where I jump in my car and take off to the highway and faster and faster I go as I am on the highway with the music on full blast so the bass would vibrate my seat. I am not in that car, someone else is driving for me and I am outside with the wind blowing across my cheeks so the tear runs slowly down running for my life. As dark clouds gather round me and sun beating on my face fingernails shiny painted this morning in blood red. I feel something but don’t know what that is sorta blank as the lights come flying behind me red flashing look down 83 but I don’t slow down because I have to run. Point a finger at me and pass by to the scene ahead of broken glass and shattered metal as I pass I realize it was put there on purpose to remind me it is me. And as I realize I am going the wrong way when I pass the light that is red and a horn blaring in through my mind I turn around and dare anyone to stop me or get in my way so I get home and lock the door and go and throw up. Mary Beth
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Wow. <<<<<<<<<<<<< Mary Beth
Thanks, I guess we can all have bad days, huh? First time stepping in that school in 19 years. It was overwhelming but I’m ok now. Mary Beth
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So was it good?
No, it brought back some memories I cared not to remember but Im glad it is over and I’m glad I faced it even though I didn’t like it. I’m sorry MB. Sounds like a really rough day…
Thanks, I tried to turn my day aroundm studied a lot (thanks to you) and feel better knowing my life is a whole hell of a lot better than it used to be…now to focus on that all the time instead… Mary Beth
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So was it good? No, it brought back some memories I cared not to remember but Im glad it is over and I’m glad I faced it even though I didn’t like it.
I think there may be a few funerals and burials of long felt feelings. Probably good, in the end. I’m sorry MB. Sounds like a really rough day… Thanks, I tried to turn my day aroundm studied a lot (thanks to you) and feel better knowing my life is a whole hell of a lot better than it used to be…now to focus on that all the time instead… Mary Beth
My life is too. Now I’m working on the next phase… very exciting. Where I get to play with other people’s lives. Whatever it is you want… you can just reach out… whatever it is that’s important stays important. Whatever road you are on it *will* lead you somewhere. I think… — "I do not know" – GlennT Trying to learn.. http://people.A2000.nl/gthomas/GlennHome.htm
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I hope you are feeling better. You sure had a hard day. Orion
Thanks, I am feeling better. Sudden relapse into childhood. Mary Beth
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I take it high school didn’t agree with you either?
I hated it. I had a lot of friends but I went through a lot of hell. Not only that, but I was very rebellious. I was a troublemaker. I was stoned every day. I think it was because I went through hell. I associate school with hell, that’s why I went through my whole series of imnsecurities and secrecy when I started posting about can I do it, what if I fail, etc. I went back to school. I had to go back to sign some releases and my head was flooding with all the bad stuff, it really made me sick to my stomach. I get pissed sometimes, I was just a kid. Mary Beth
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This is very frightening. I am glad you got home safely.
Thanks Patricia. I am stupid sometimes. I tend to react..quickly but then I did all I could to turn my day around and think about the positive instead of really, really old shit. Mary Beth
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I had such a horrid day today… I was up all night (to midnight) writing/typing up essays about Julius Caesar for English class, and working on my speech. This morning, I hit the snooze button an extra time and then spent 5 minutes comtemplating whether it was even worth it to get out of bed… I decided it wasn’t, but I knew my mom would throw a fit… I had my usual breakfast…a handful of assorted pills and some cookies that I forced myself to eat…except that this morning, it almost made me throw up. All day, I tried to practice my speech, but could’t concentrate. During At lunch, I was sitting outside, and I overheard some bitch talking about one of my friends (who also happens to be the guy I like). She said she liked him, and also mentioned how he’d been messing around w/ some other girl over the weekend… I eat outside to get *away* from her and her friends… The whole time we were eating, my friends and I didn’t talk to each other at all, ’cause they know how I feel ’bout that guy… When I went up to my locker, I started crying and couldn’t stop…it was the first time (other than one of the dances) when I had cried in school since 6th-grade. Unfortunately, my best friend had already gone to her next class by then… I called my mom to see if she’d call the school, saying I had an appt and had to miss last pd (speech class). I was crying so hard….and there were a lot of ppl around… She said she wouldn’t, ’cause she’s a bad lier, and told me to go to the office. After I hung up the phone, my Bio teacher asked me what was wrong. He suggested that I talk to my speech teacher. I did, and he told me to go to the Dean. Luckily, I’m on really good terms w/ all the teachers at my school, so the Dean agreed to write me a pass. After that, I went to Math class, and took a test… Usually I am so good in Math (top student), but today I could not concentrate. I think I did pretty good (99 or 100), but only after I fixed all the mistakes. I had all the formulas wrong and had made some pretty dumb arithmetic mistakes… Just my luck, I sit next to that guy in that class….he didn’t even comment on how upset I looked (I had stopped crying, but my eyes were still red, and my makeup was all streaked…) I made it through Speech class, at least. The teacher made it clear that no one was going to comment on why I wasn’t giving my speech, and that kept a few ppl in chk…but there’s this one bitch who always trying to get involved in everyone else’s business who kept asking…I just ignored her. I did tell a few of the ppl whom I sit by, ’cause they’re my friends and I knew that they honestly cared… They really did cheer me up a bit. After school, I was getting changed for work, when 2 of the snobby friends of Bitch #1 (the one I had to listen to during lunch) came into the bathroom holding a note she had received. From what I heard, one of the sentances read "I love you"…and I was able to catch a glimpse at the handwriting…it was that guys… I knew that he liked her, but he said he was trying to keep it quiet… I almost started crying again……. Adri, needing a hug or some advice…or whatever…
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There’s your hug, let’s see if I can come up with some advice. … I read yur story and ‘m sure glad I’m not in school anymore. All the cattiness and gameplaying. The best I can offer is remember that it’s their problem and it’s not about you personally. …. This guy is probably not worth your time and attention. You are upset at the other girls he likes, but he is the one flirting with everyone in sight. … You got a 99 or 100 when you having a bad day, couldn’t concenrate and had to fix mistakes? That’s pretty good, you must be smart. … I have a hunch if you gave the speech anyway, you wuld have done a damn good job, despite how bad you felt. One more time:
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I’ll hug you if you hug me! (((Adri))) Can’t come up with any advice though.
{{{{{{{Tobias}}}}}}} The hugs were greatly appreciated. I have to see these ppl again at school tomorrow… But neither of them know how I’m feeling… I’m not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing? — Lemming #: 44305924592196 Troll #: 326451251 Troll Bridge #: 26 Lap-dog to Bob. Lap-Blanket to Cris. ICQ UIN: 8347933; name: Magidraki AOL SN: AdgeDVM Private e-mail welcome; NO unsolicited commercial e-mail, though!! Caer Magidraki: http://www.angelfire.com/pa/Magidrakee/entrancegate.html Got a gripe?? Who cares?: http://www.angelfire.com/pa/Magidrakee
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[snip terrible day] Adri, needing a hug or some advice…or whatever…
I’ll hug you if you hug me! (((Adri))) Can’t come up with any advice though.
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I had such a horrid day today… I was up all night (to midnight) writing/typing up essays about Julius Caesar for English class, and working on my speech. This morning, I hit the snooze button an extra time and then spent 5 minutes comtemplating whether it was even worth it to get out of bed… I decided it wasn’t, but I knew my mom would throw a fit… I had my usual breakfast…a handful of assorted pills and some cookies that I forced myself to eat…except that this morning, it almost made me throw up. All day, I tried to practice my speech, but could’t concentrate. During At lunch, I was sitting outside, and I overheard some bitch talking about one of my friends (who also happens to be the guy I like). She said she liked him, and also mentioned how he’d been messing around w/ some other girl over the weekend… I eat outside to get *away* from her and her friends… The whole time we were eating, my friends and I didn’t talk to each other at all, ’cause they know how I feel ’bout that guy… When I went up to my locker, I started crying and couldn’t stop…it was the first time (other than one of the dances) when I had cried in school since 6th-grade. Unfortunately, my best friend had already gone to her next class by then… I called my mom to see if she’d call the school, saying I had an appt and had to miss last pd (speech class). I was crying so hard….and there were a lot of ppl around… She said she wouldn’t, ’cause she’s a bad lier, and told me to go to the office. After I hung up the phone, my Bio teacher asked me what was wrong. He suggested that I talk to my speech teacher. I did, and he told me to go to the Dean. Luckily, I’m on really good terms w/ all the teachers at my school, so the Dean agreed to write me a pass. After that, I went to Math class, and took a test… Usually I am so good in Math (top student), but today I could not concentrate. I think I did pretty good (99 or 100), but only after I fixed all the mistakes. I had all the formulas wrong and had made some pretty dumb arithmetic mistakes… Just my luck, I sit next to that guy in that class….he didn’t even comment on how upset I looked (I had stopped crying, but my eyes were still red, and my makeup was all streaked…) I made it through Speech class, at least. The teacher made it clear that no one was going to comment on why I wasn’t giving my speech, and that kept a few ppl in chk…but there’s this one bitch who always trying to get involved in everyone else’s business who kept asking…I just ignored her. I did tell a few of the ppl whom I sit by, ’cause they’re my friends and I knew that they honestly cared… They really did cheer me up a bit. After school, I was getting changed for work, when 2 of the snobby friends of Bitch #1 (the one I had to listen to during lunch) came into the bathroom holding a note she had received. From what I heard, one of the sentances read "I love you"…and I was able to catch a glimpse at the handwriting…it was that guys… I knew that he liked her, but he said he was trying to keep it quiet… I almost started crying again……. Adri, needing a hug or some advice…or whatever…
hy smart angel, Unfortunately, I have no appreciable advice for you, because i