Dissociation Talk

Question:

I am currently reading Quicksilver by Neal Stephenson its like over 900 pages then going to The Confusion. These books are Volumes 1 and 2 of the Baroque Cycle. The first book is pretty nifty. I have like 190 pages to go the 2nd book is just a tad over 800 pages. Yay what fun. I have around 900 books to read. I think eventually I’m going to go in alphabetical order maybe. Btw, on a side note I have Disorganized Schizophrenia being diagnosed in the summer of 1991 and I am 28 years old. I was recently additionally diagonosed with Accute Dissociative Disorder and Bipolar disorder. Yay me. I take Trileptal 600 mg twice daily, Seroquel 300 mg twice daily, visteril 25 mg in the morning and at 2pm and 50 mg at night, Remeron 45 mg at night, Symmatrel 100 mg in the morning and at night, and Vitamin E 400mg 3 times daily.

Response:

DrkLegion wrote: > I am currently reading Quicksilver by Neal Stephenson its like over 900 pages then going to The Confusion. These books are Volumes 1 and 2 of the Baroque Cycle. The first book is pretty nifty. I have like 190 pages to go the 2nd book is just a tad over 800 pages. Yay what fun. I have around 900 books to read. I think eventually I’m going to go in alphabetical order maybe. Btw, on a side note I have Disorganized Schizophrenia being diagnosed in the summer of 1991 and I am 28 years old. I was recently additionally diagonosed with Accute Dissociative Disorder and Bipolar disorder. Yay me. I take Trileptal 600 mg twice daily, Seroquel 300 mg twice daily, visteril 25 mg in the morning and at 2pm and 50 mg at night, Remeron 45 mg at night, Symmatrel 100 mg in the morning and at night, and Vitamin E 400mg 3 times daily.

Hi there.  I’ve never heard of disorganized schizophrenia.  What is it? You seem to be on one heck of a cocktail.  How are the side-effects? dM

Response:

D

Question:

posted here, there and everywhere again: hey, sorry to whine and beg, then whine and beg without any give between whine and begs, but we are doing the crisis thing and it has taken us since thurs to even be able to write this very simple post. the t’pist who tried to bin me sat me down this week a nd saiud that she hadn’t realized how much of a dissociative disorder that i had. said she couldn’t deal with it because she didn’t know how/wasn’t qualified, and gave me 2 #’s and told me good luck in the world. (one is on vacation, and we don’t even know if she takes medicaid/medicare. the other is available to speak with at the end of the month. ) i am adrift, and freaking out, and shaking like hel;l. this is about the billionth time i have been sent to an incompetent T just becaus i have medicaid and no options. i want to interview T’s like a normal person. i trust slooooowluly. i finally trust this woman a tad, and i’m out on my a… my trust just recoiled like an over-wound spring shade. the ISSD doesn’t have anything listed on their website. neither does RAINN, 1-800-THERAPIST, nor the EMDR page i looked at. nothing from RI that is. does anyone know anything that might help me in this search? we’re sorry if we sound mad and upset, it’s just because we are. and so d’mn scared.  we’ll be ok, we alswausl make it out of these things alive despite. i just…. well, i’m tired and scared. and tired of being that way. but i really am looking for practical help, andd trying to do all of those things that you’re supposed to: time with friends, eat chocolate, stay away from your family, etc. all i need dto learn now is how to stay safe. embies, feelin’ some things Be bold in what you stand for and careful of what you fall for. ~ Ruth Boorstin — For more information about this posting service, contact: If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

posted here, there and everywhere again: hey, sorry to whine and beg, then whine and beg without any give between whine and begs, but we are doing the crisis thing and it has taken us since thurs to even be able to write this very simple post. the t’pist who tried to bin me sat me down this week a nd saiud that she hadn’t realized how much of a dissociative disorder that i had. said she couldn’t deal with it because she didn’t know how/wasn’t qualified, and gave me 2 #’s and told me good luck in the world. (one is on vacation, and we don’t even know if she takes medicaid/medicare. the other is available to speak with at the end of the month. )

Sheesh and geez and all that. Why are t’pists so STUPID! The one available at the end of the month, can you set that up just so you have it just in case? The other one, no one can tell you this? Not even medicaid/medicare? i am adrift, and freaking out, and shaking like hel;l. this is about the billionth time i have been sent to an incompetent T just becaus i have medicaid and no options. i want to interview T’s like a normal person. i trust slooooowluly. i finally trust this woman a tad, and i’m out on my a… my trust just recoiled like an over-wound spring shade.

Have you told her this and stressed how you need just some basic crisis intervention type stuff right now while you are looking for other help? the ISSD doesn’t have anything listed on their website. neither does RAINN, 1-800-THERAPIST, nor the EMDR page i looked at. nothing from RI that is.

Move to IL where my bestest t’pist is or to CO where you can at least hang with me on a regular basis? Plus I have a few people in CO and IL I can think of… RI is just too small Geez and sheesh and all that. Rainbow Colors (Jill) does anyone know anything that might help me in this search? we’re sorry if we sound mad and upset, it’s just because we are. and so d’mn scared.  we’ll be ok, we alswausl make it out of these things alive despite. i just…. well, i’m tired and scared. and tired of being that way. but i really am looking for practical help, andd trying to do all of those things that you’re supposed to: time with friends, eat chocolate, stay away from your family, etc. all i need dto learn now is how to stay safe. embies, feelin’ some things

–      The colors blend, the edges soften. Swirling and mixing                    we are becoming white light.

Response:

reply p/e embie, what about calling McLean in Boston and seeing if they know of anyone in the area?  not too far from you and they have a well-known (won’t say good or bad) dissociative program.  granted, you don’t want to end up in the inpatient program, but they might be able to give you some referrals. McLean Hospital, 115 Mill Street, Belmont, MA  02478 Switchboard: 617-855-2000    Toll Free: 800-333-0338 Information can be obtained about the Dissociative Disorders and Trauma Inpatient Program by calling 1-800/333-0338.  Sherry Winternitz, MD, Clinical Director. Information about the Women’s Treatment Program can be obtained by calling, Monday through Friday, 617/855-2595.  You may also contact the Women’s hoping some of this helps.  call us if you need to do so, okay. michelle & the rest — — though it harm none, do as ye will! — — blessed be! —

Response:

oh my goodness!

posted here, there and everywhere again: hey, sorry to whine and beg, then whine and beg without any give between whine and begs, but we are doing the crisis thing and it has taken us since thurs to even be able to write this very simple post.

hey, don’t worry about it.  i know exactly, exactly, and i mean exactly what you’re talkin about. the t’pist who tried to bin me sat me down this week a nd saiud that she hadn’t realized how much of a dissociative disorder that i had. said she couldn’t deal with it because she didn’t know how/wasn’t qualified, and gave me 2 #’s and told me good luck in the world.

i got done this exact same way.  and so i said, please write me a summary that state clearly that you terminated with full knowledge that i need lots of help and you decided not to give it to me, oh and don’t forget to mention the fact that you represented yourself as an expert in dealing with d.i.d, and that you di that after i asked you specific questions about your training and experience with this dx/disorder/or whatever the blank you wanna call it today.  and the t said, and get this, it really blew my mind, "trill, you have a ph.d. in comparative literature with a concentration in rhetoric.  there is no way that i could possibly ever win any argument with you, so i’m not even going to try."     and this "psychologist" has, or claims to have, a ph.d. in psychology!!! what was sie talking about? (one is on vacation, and we don’t even know if she takes medicaid/medicare. the other is available to speak with at the end of the month. ) i am adrift, and freaking out, and shaking like hel;l.

oh yeah, me, too.  and resorting to drastic measure in desperate fear of being adrift and alone. this is about the billionth time i have been sent to an incompetent T

me, too. just becaus i have medicaid and no options.

almost the same with medicare. i want to interview T’s like a normal person.

me, too.  and they never give me the chance.  they immediately take control and decide what we’ll talk about and how.  and if i try, even in the meekest way, to assert myself at all and even carefully and quietly comment that I’d like to ask a few questions of hir, whoever the partimuclar t of the moment might be, sie refuses.  "next time," sie says.  and most often there never is a next time. i trust slooooowluly. i finally trust this woman a tad, and i’m out on my a… my trust just recoiled like an over-wound spring shade. the ISSD doesn’t have anything listed on their website. neither does RAINN, 1-800-THERAPIST, nor the EMDR page i looked at.

i found 3 names around here from the issd site, and they all answered, "well, i don’t even know how to take maedicare.  i feel for you, i really do, and i wish you the best."     i’ve decided that, categorically, i h*te all Ts. nothing from RI that is. does anyone know anything that might help me in this search? we’re sorry if we sound mad and upset, it’s just because we are. and so d’mn scared.

    sorry you gotta said face, but i know what you mean about being mad and upset.  with everything going the way everyting is going in the u.s. politics and economics and social values, i think that Ts and other people in so-called helping professions don’t even realize how much they’ve moved to right side of the parliment as they struggle for their own survival.  of course, they raise the bar for themselves on what they consider to constitute survival.  compare my home to any of theirs, or your home to any of theirs, and you’ll see what i mean. we’ll be ok, we alswausl make it out of these things alive despite.

i like that you write the above.  i’ll take inspiration from it.  but i’m not as certain about myself, especially considering my close friend’s recent s**cde.  but, i’m still trying.  and tomorrow i’m heading for the beach to spend about a week with a woman i’ve been dating(big new adventure for me — the dating more than the beach trip, although that’s gonna be a big deal, too.  but the bus people (we’re going on a bus, Potato and me) are being super nice about Potato and about helping me with my luggage and getting on and of the bus, which actually is, sometimes, not always, but sometime, difficult for me.) i just…. well, i’m tired and scared. and tired of being that way. but i really am looking for practical help, andd trying to do all of those things that you’re supposed to: time with friends, eat chocolate, stay away from your family, etc. all i need dto learn now is how to stay safe.

please.  consider your recent horseback riding accident as your quota for self-injury for the next 15 to 20 decades, why doncha? embies, feelin’ some things

    good.  please feel the good things, as many of them as you can before they are all taken away from us. Be bold in what you stand for and careful of what you fall for. ~ Ruth Boorstin

good sig line. see you when i get home, trill – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – — For more information about this posting service, contact: If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

Dear embies, our friend,    Knowing fully how you are feeling as we were suddenly cut adrift ourselves recently. We wish you good fortune in finding a t. Wish we lived closer by so I could see if my new one would be able to help. He’s managed to make space for us, so maybe for you and yours as well, if you were not so far away. This stinks, dear embies. Can smell it all the way to canadaland. Our carings go with you embies, our hand out for holding if you wish, a hug at the ready if that isn’t squicky or anything. not considering this whining and begging, but just the only thing you can be doing right now with all this going on. Am glad to see you are mad and upset. seems appropriate to me. Not that I want you mad or upset, but it is better than curling up and giving up, right? A little something i’ve managed to learn over the last years. :0/ Hoping you will keep writing here so we can all talk with you. peas, to quote someone dear, from jane – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – posted here, there and everywhere again: hey, sorry to whine and beg, then whine and beg without any give between whine and begs, but we are doing the crisis thing and it has taken us since thurs to even be able to write this very simple post. the t’pist who tried to bin me sat me down this week a nd saiud that she hadn’t realized how much of a dissociative disorder that i had. said she couldn’t deal with it because she didn’t know how/wasn’t qualified, and gave me 2 #’s and told me good luck in the world. (one is on vacation, and we don’t even know if she takes medicaid/medicare. the other is available to speak with at the end of the month. ) i am adrift, and freaking out, and shaking like hel;l. this is about the billionth time i have been sent to an incompetent T just becaus i have medicaid and no options. i want to interview T’s like a normal person. i trust slooooowluly. i finally trust this woman a tad, and i’m out on my a… my trust just recoiled like an over-wound spring shade. the ISSD doesn’t have anything listed on their website. neither does RAINN, 1-800-THERAPIST, nor the EMDR page i looked at. nothing from RI that is. does anyone know anything that might help me in this search? we’re sorry if we sound mad and upset, it’s just because we are. and so d’mn scared.  we’ll be ok, we alswausl make it out of these things alive despite. i just…. well, i’m tired and scared. and tired of being that way. but i really am looking for practical help, andd trying to do all of those things that you’re supposed to: time with friends, eat chocolate, stay away from your family, etc. all i need dto learn now is how to stay safe. embies, feelin’ some things Be bold in what you stand for and careful of what you fall for. ~ Ruth Boorstin

Response:

*wraps embies in warmth and l*ve and caring*, if ok. jt

posted here, there and everywhere again: hey, sorry to whine and beg, then whine and beg without any give between whine and begs, but we are doing the crisis thing and it has taken us since thurs to even be able to write this very simple post. the t’pist who tried to bin me sat me down this week a nd saiud that she hadn’t realized how much of a dissociative disorder that i had. said she couldn’t deal with it because she didn’t know

how/wasn’t qualified, and gave me 2 #’s and told me good luck in the world. (one is on vacation, and we don’t even know if she takes

medicaid/medicare. the – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – other is available to speak with at the end of the month. ) i am adrift, and freaking out, and shaking like hel;l. this is about the billionth time i have been sent to an incompetent T just becaus i have medicaid and no options. i want to interview T’s like a normal person. i trust slooooowluly. i finally trust this woman a tad, and i’m out on my a… my trust just recoiled like an over-wound spring shade. the ISSD doesn’t have anything listed on their website. neither does RAINN, 1-800-THERAPIST, nor the EMDR page i looked at. nothing from RI that is. does anyone know anything that might help me in this search? we’re sorry if we sound mad and upset, it’s just because we are. and so d’mn scared.  we’ll be ok, we alswausl make it out of these things alive despite. i just…. well, i’m tired and scared. and tired of being that way. but i really am looking for practical help, andd trying to do all of those things that you’re supposed to: time with friends, eat chocolate, stay away from your family, etc. all i need dto learn now is how to stay safe. embies, feelin’ some things

Be bold in what you stand for and careful of what you fall for. ~ Ruth Boorstin

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – — For more information about this posting service, contact: If you want an anonymous account, visit our sign-up page: https://asarian-host.net/cgi-bin/signup.cgi

Response:

Question:

Hi Beauty,     I’m beginning to feel a bit better.  Everyone else has been feeling down and hence the reduction in traffic.  I also don’t think they understood what I was writing about.  There are only a couple of other DID people there and they caught on.  And I confess that the worse I get the more cryptic I become.     It is my underlying self image that I am of no worth and nobody who is anybody would have anything to do with me unless it benefited them.  That is not a healthy frame of mind and I am working on altering it.  But that will be hard.     I think art is grand.  I do hope it re-emerges within you.  I used to be artistic, but I can’t manage it anymore.  I do scan different things I find around the house so that I can construct layer by layer with Gimp original glyths and icons and pictures for my software. spoilered for talk about s*lf h*rm. a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y zed   I have been having a really switchy episode concering c*tt*ng, which is something I have been doing a lot lately.  But I am figuring things out and I hope that maybe (maybe?) I will stop this self h*rm*ng process.  It seems to be related to identifying a deeply buried and dark insider.  I’m a little nervous about it all, but with the help of my pdoc I hope I can get through it. Best wishes, Peter

Response:

Hi – Thanks for writing.  Thanks so much.  I sympathize about the packing.  I’m trying to arrange a studio which has been a mess for years, and I am overwhelmed beyond saying. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Oh my goodness.  You gotta be kidding!  I just logged on to over 200 unread msgs and I’ve only been away for about 20 hours or so.     I am overwhelmed and will probably not read them all.         But anyway, I’m here and i will probalbly be around a whole bunch in the nesxt couple of weeks befausexsxc I’m moving and packing up and stuff way triggers me so i keep procrastinating and avoiding and dissing and asd works well for those purposes for me when ive got an impending and improtttrrtant time-sensitive task ast hand. trill, losing it, evidently, just trying to explain myself. Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Oh my goodness.  You gotta be kidding!  I just logged on to over 200 unread msgs and I’ve only been away for about 20 hours or so.     I am overwhelmed and will probably not read them all.         But anyway, I’m here and i will probalbly be around a whole bunch in the nesxt couple of weeks befausexsxc I’m moving and packing up and stuff way triggers me so i keep procrastinating and avoiding and dissing and asd works well for those purposes for me when ive got an impending and improtttrrtant time-sensitive task ast hand. trill, losing it, evidently, just trying to explain myself.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

    I know what you mean.  I am having the same experience but on my news server.  I feel as though I should be a good little whatever and just program and be quiet.  Luckily a couple of people talk to me.     It’s too bad you feel redundant.  Thanks for your condolences. Peter

Response:

I’m sorry you feel ill-used on your server – and hope that at least you have some respite elsewhere.  I can find escape in reading – but at the end of the day, it just feels as if sand has sifted through the glass to no avail.  I had my art at one time – not so very long ago – but that seems to have hidden itself.  Well, I don’t know – whining isn’t getting my anywhere either, is it?  But I appreciate your response, and hope that, well, wish that you didn’t have a situation from which to empathize – Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –     I know what you mean.  I am having the same experience but on my news server.  I feel as though I should be a good little whatever and just program and be quiet.  Luckily a couple of people talk to me.     It’s too bad you feel redundant.  Thanks for your condolences. Peter

Response:

Hi – Thanks for saying hello – Sounds like things are esp. hard for you right now, and I’m sorry. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello Beauty, I’m out here doing mostly reading of posts at the moment. You’re not alone, least not at the moment. :O) SofT Anybody out there? Feels like all the lines have gone quiet. Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. — For info about this service, see http://anon.twwells.com/help/ or e-mail:

Response:

Sorry you’re feeling lonely.  Here in my house I feel redundant.  If I keep to myself, I feel as if I am promoting an isolationist atmosphere.  If I try to stay nr. husb., it seems he moves to another room.  If I happen to come nr. son, he asks what I am doing or what I want.  I have no feeling of dignity just now. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Me too. Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Hello Beauty, I’m out here doing mostly reading of posts at the moment. You’re not alone, least not at the moment. :O) SofT Anybody out there? Feels like all the lines have gone quiet. Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

– For info about this service, see http://anon.twwells.com/help/ or e-mail:

Response:

Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Me too.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

yeah.  Somebody to help, not so much in doing the workm, but just to be present and keep me on task, sort of a friendly presence supervisor would make a big difference.  Somebody from asd volunteered to do this, even.  And then i would do the same thing for hir later.  problem:  we’re both so totally brok e we cant even get to each other. — no running vehicles (como tu, no) y no dinero tampoco. Mi "t" fuera a la cuba por totalmente de junio, e yo tengo mucho temor sobre eso.  Pero, la mayoria de mis problemas es eso.  Tengo dos mil, o mas, libros.  tambien, hay muchos papeles.  entonces, es muy dificil para mi… otra vez, como tu, no? lo siento para hablar sobre mi movimiento.  es un grande and bueno.  creo que soy estupido.  y no puedo deletrear las palabras en espanol y no puedo hacer las oraciones, tampoco.  olvide todos de mis palabras y la gramatica, pero, a veces, prefiero hablar o escribir en espanol por que pienso en espanol.  me entiende?  cuando pienso sobre cuba, entonces, pienso en espanol. soy loco y estupido.  necisito ayuda. nos vemos, trill

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi – Thanks for writing.  Thanks so much.  I sympathize about the packing.  I’m trying to arrange a studio which has been a mess for years, and I am overwhelmed beyond saying. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. Oh my goodness.  You gotta be kidding!  I just logged on to over 200 unread msgs and I’ve only been away for about 20 hours or so.     I am overwhelmed and will probably not read them all.         But anyway, I’m here and i will probalbly be around a whole bunch in the nesxt couple of weeks befausexsxc I’m moving and packing up and stuff way triggers me so i keep procrastinating and avoiding and dissing and asd works well for those purposes for me when ive got an impending and improtttrrtant time-sensitive task ast hand. trill, losing it, evidently, just trying to explain myself. Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Thank you for writing.  It helps when people write. The loneliness is for reasons that don’t seem likely to change in the foreseeable future.  I hope I can find some better workarounds. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – We are here.  We wasn’t here earlier today cause we had group therapy this morning and then this afternoon we went driving around the countryside looking for scenery and wildlife to take pictures of to paint/draw.  It was fun!  Saw lots of pretty scenery and we even saw a Great Blue Heron! We took a picture of it but we were on the opposite side of the river, so not sure how it will turn out – good I hope. But we are here.  Hope you’re feeling less lonely. Rainstar Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To e-mail remove extra from address

Response:

e and Peter,     This makes sense to me in that when I studied Spanish I often, unconsciously, responded to my teachers and tutors in French, a language I can barely remember and could barely remember then, but one that I had studied for six years in public schools many years before. trill

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Peter, i hope you get through the c*tting and your feelings of worthlessness soon. good to see you posting. just wanted you to know that, when i’m here, i read your posts and enjoy them. oh yeah. i think you were the one who wrote about windows on a Linux machine and a memory or a feeling that wasn’t accessible when you were in a different state of mind. i wanted to tell you that, back in the dark ages when i was studying cognitive psych, it was already well-established that there are "state-dependent memories." i.e., if something happened when you were angry, you’d be much more likely to remember it when you were angry again. you might not be able to remember it at all unless you were angry. there were also "state-dependent states." IIRC (and it’s been years), an example of that would be if you got very, very weepy – much more weepy and sad than you’d ever been – when you were drunk. then, if you got drunk again, you’d be much more likely to get very, very weepy and sad again. you might never feel that way except when you were drunk. and the phenomenon of "state-dependent" memories would operate then, too. so the research from back in the very old days seems to support what you said. there is probably newer stuff that might help more. HTH, e

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Beauty,     I’m beginning to feel a bit better.  Everyone else has been feeling down and hence the reduction in traffic.  I also don’t think they understood what I was writing about.  There are only a couple of other DID people there and they caught on.  And I confess that the worse I get the more cryptic I become.     It is my underlying self image that I am of no worth and nobody who is anybody would have anything to do with me unless it benefited them. That is not a healthy frame of mind and I am working on altering it.  But that will be hard.     I think art is grand.  I do hope it re-emerges within you.  I used to be artistic, but I can’t manage it anymore.  I do scan different things I find around the house so that I can construct layer by layer with Gimp original glyths and icons and pictures for my software. spoilered for talk about s*lf h*rm. a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y zed   I have been having a really switchy episode concering c*tt*ng, which is something I have been doing a lot lately.  But I am figuring things out and I hope that maybe (maybe?) I will stop this self h*rm*ng process.  It seems to be related to identifying a deeply buried and dark insider.  I’m a little nervous about it all, but with the help of my pdoc I hope I can get through it. Best wishes, Peter

Response:

Dear Peter – Earnest wishes for your peace and safety. I am sorry that you feel of no worth – I don’t feel that way about you.  (I know the feeling though – I can find it all too easily w/in myself.) Best – Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Beauty,     I’m beginning to feel a bit better.  Everyone else has been feeling down and hence the reduction in traffic.  I also don’t think they understood what I was writing about.  There are only a couple of other DID people there and they caught on.  And I confess that the worse I get the more cryptic I become.     It is my underlying self image that I am of no worth and nobody who is anybody would have anything to do with me unless it benefited them.  That is not a healthy frame of mind and I am working on altering it.  But that will be hard.     I think art is grand.  I do hope it re-emerges within you.  I used to be artistic, but I can’t manage it anymore.  I do scan different things I find around the house so that I can construct layer by layer with Gimp original glyths and icons and pictures for my software. spoilered for talk about s*lf h*rm. a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y zed   I have been having a really switchy episode concering c*tt*ng, which is something I have been doing a lot lately.  But I am figuring things out and I hope that maybe (maybe?) I will stop this self h*rm*ng process.  It seems to be related to identifying a deeply buried and dark insider.  I’m a little nervous about it all, but with the help of my pdoc I hope I can get through it. Best wishes, Peter

Response:

We are here.  We wasn’t here earlier today cause we had group therapy this morning and then this afternoon we went driving around the countryside looking for scenery and wildlife to take pictures of to paint/draw.  It was fun!  Saw lots of pretty scenery and we even saw a Great Blue Heron! We took a picture of it but we were on the opposite side of the river, so not sure how it will turn out – good I hope. But we are here.  Hope you’re feeling less lonely. Rainstar Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty.

– To e-mail remove extra from address

Response:

Hey you guys Sorry… weekends are hectic times for us…:o) Our "puter time is severely restricted…  :o( We saw your post, and thought we’d write about our weekend..(to give you something to read)  :o) (unfortunatly..it didn’t get posted) We’s had in our hot little hands that nice little b*day bonus from the foo.. ) The daughter’s SO somehow managed to pay his share of their rent (but that’s another story) The point is.. we had money to spend and we knew just how to spend it! Bright and early saturday morning me and the granddaughter broke camp(we often sleeps in fashioned tents and stuff)  :o) We rustled up a hearty breakfast then it was off to the big box type store….. No walkin’ today!!  This was a special trip! Nothing less than public transport. for us ) Excitement and anticipation abounds, as we enter the store and weave through the aisles… Finally our *objet de desire* comes into view… Gleaming brilliantly under the flourescent lights.. Little hearts are a’flutter, as we go through the checklist! purple—–check bright and shiny— check purple—–check racing stripes—–check purple—–check two wheels—-check purple—–check 14" inseam— check purple—–check extra set of wheels on back—–check We’s ain’t seen a happier kid in our lives   D We was a little concerned about the distance that her first bike ride might be a bit too long… But ya know that little tyke pedalled the whole 5 miles back home and was raring to go and go and go… After a quick soup break we was off again… We’s intensely covered a 12 block area visiting 6 parks/playgrounds by nightfall….. We capped off our evening with a private viewing of "Sl*ppy(a) and the St*nkers(i)…. an entertaining piece, reminicent of The_Little_Rascals and Free_Willy… Ya know…it was much easier when she was in the stroller!! We’s could walk a long ways ,  using the stroller as a walker, thereby releaving our upper body weight from our back.. I don’t know which one of us was more worn out… But we both crashed real early J/c who’s goin’ to be payin’ for this for a loong time P.S. hope things are picking up for you guys

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Hi e and trill,     Thanks for your replies.  The flashbacks continue and they are triggered by any number of different things.  I sometimes think it is a song, or a smell, or a type of food.  Always different, but always the same feeling.     But the mind and memory is just as you say.  I remember that from introductory psychology.  The feeling seems to be related to my time when I was coming face to face with the fact that I have a dissociative disorder.     Thanks for your interest in my posts.  Sometimes my posts are silly; and sometimes I try to add something valuable.     I do hope I can stop c*tting.  I seem to have found an insider that is repressed and hides away in fear and anger.  With the bringing about of order amongst those insiders who have been identified it seemed that the lost insider became more evident.  This is all part of the process of organizing my mind and maybe this is a step forward.  I am thinking in terms of TEAM and having some success I think. Thank you for your input e and trill, Peter

Response:

Peter, i hope you get through the c*tting and your feelings of worthlessness soon. good to see you posting. just wanted you to know that, when i’m here, i read your posts and enjoy them. oh yeah. i think you were the one who wrote about windows on a Linux machine and a memory or a feeling that wasn’t accessible when you were in a different state of mind. i wanted to tell you that, back in the dark ages when i was studying cognitive psych, it was already well-established that there are "state-dependent memories." i.e., if something happened when you were angry, you’d be much more likely to remember it when you were angry again. you might not be able to remember it at all unless you were angry. there were also "state-dependent states." IIRC (and it’s been years), an example of that would be if you got very, very weepy – much more weepy and sad than you’d ever been – when you were drunk. then, if you got drunk again, you’d be much more likely to get very, very weepy and sad again. you might never feel that way except when you were drunk. and the phenomenon of "state-dependent" memories would operate then, too. so the research from back in the very old days seems to support what you said. there is probably newer stuff that might help more. HTH, e – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Beauty,     I’m beginning to feel a bit better.  Everyone else has been feeling down and hence the reduction in traffic.  I also don’t think they understood what I was writing about.  There are only a couple of other DID people there and they caught on.  And I confess that the worse I get the more cryptic I become.     It is my underlying self image that I am of no worth and nobody who is anybody would have anything to do with me unless it benefited them.  That is not a healthy frame of mind and I am working on altering it.  But that will be hard.     I think art is grand.  I do hope it re-emerges within you.  I used to be artistic, but I can’t manage it anymore.  I do scan different things I find around the house so that I can construct layer by layer with Gimp original glyths and icons and pictures for my software. spoilered for talk about s*lf h*rm. a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y zed   I have been having a really switchy episode concering c*tt*ng, which is something I have been doing a lot lately.  But I am figuring things out and I hope that maybe (maybe?) I will stop this self h*rm*ng process.  It seems to be related to identifying a deeply buried and dark insider.  I’m a little nervous about it all, but with the help of my pdoc I hope I can get through it. Best wishes, Peter

Response:

Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty.

am here. too bad you’re lonely and that you feel superfluous (or was that redundant?) at your house. i wish we could sit in one of our messy houses or a motel room (even a cheap one) or a coffee house or bookstore or somewhere and talk or just sit. or maybe we could sleep.  hope things get better for you soon.  e

Response:

I’m still floating around…like a dog without a leg to stand on!! lol D Phoenix

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Hi e and trill,     Thanks for your replies.  The flashbacks continue and they are triggered by any number of different things.  I sometimes think it is a song, or a smell, or a type of food.  Always different, but always the same feeling.

do the things that trigger you give you any clues about what you’re looking for? (and what was that? sorry but my memory’s not good.) do the flashbacks? those kinds of things help some ppl construct a memory (not necessarily an accurate one but i don’t think that matters as long as it works for them) or reach some kind of resolution.     But the mind and memory is just as you say.  I remember that from introductory psychology.  The feeling seems to be related to my time when I was coming face to face with the fact that I have a dissociative disorder.

that may be an important clue.     Thanks for your interest in my posts.  Sometimes my posts are silly; and sometimes I try to add something valuable.

me, too.     I do hope I can stop c*tting.  

me, too. I seem to have found an insider that is repressed and hides away in fear and anger.  

  With the bringing about of order amongst those insiders who have been identified it seemed that the lost insider became more evident.  This is all part of the process of organizing my mind and maybe this is a step forward.  

it sounds like it. I am thinking in terms of TEAM and having some success I think. Thank you for your input e and trill, Peter

you’re welcome.   e

Response:

Superfluous, redundant, same-same (small weary smile).  Thanks for the company-making reply.  Definitely my house would be messy to sit in, but that would be okay because I’d know  wouldn’t hold it against me – Beauty.

wouldn’t care at all. i’d feel right at home.  ;)   i hope that things are going better at home. e

Response:

am here. strange doings.  lost self in game for many hours.  spent time w/hubby.  ripped up check for $50 from a*nt married to thebadman.  check was handed to me by fthr. fght with hubby.  explained why not addcted to game by explaining what’s actually wrong that i’m running away from. told hubby would be extremely difficult and there’d be a point where i wouldn’t be able to talk anymore because my throat would close from anxiety.. hubby tried to say something "supportive" that was going to wreck the deal inside.  told hubby needed him not to say anything.  b4 throat closed hubby tried to say something. snapped at him because his attempt to comfort wrecked the deal inside.  hubby got nasty (v.rare for him) angry at me for snapping when "all he was trying to do was be supportive" (he didn’t say that.  didn’t have to) why no one understand how isscary hard is to talk?  why no one understand? why it no safe to talk??  i ask this.  not rhet. is feel notgood.  :( dyenths/jt

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Oh Heeeeeee – thank you kcause that makes me giggle an also remember that I owe you a picture!!! See you later – Beauty.s — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’m still floating around…like a dog without a leg to stand on!! lol D Phoenix Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

Response:

Superfluous, redundant, same-same (small weary smile).  Thanks for the company-making reply.  Definitely my house would be messy to sit in, but that would be okay because I’d know  wouldn’t hold it against me – Beauty. — To email me, remove "nospam" from my address.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Anybody out there?  Feels like all the lines have gone quiet.  Feeling lonely. Beauty. am here. too bad you’re lonely and that you feel superfluous (or was that redundant?) at your house. i wish we could sit in one of our messy houses or a motel room (even a cheap one) or a coffee house or bookstore or somewhere and talk or just sit. or maybe we could sleep.  hope things get better for you soon.  e

Response:

Question:

I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse.  It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.

Response:

Welcome to asd Cristie. Sierra of TribalNation (TN)

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse.  It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.

Response:

Hi Cristie… I see you (your post) so you must have done something right, and welcome. You will find a lot of helpful folks here. 14, a name not a number

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse.  It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.

Response:

Yep, we are here, and now you are, too.  Looks like you are doing just fine with the internet.  Welcome. mdove – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I somehow found this site for support for DID’s. I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books. I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse. It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder. I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy. I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me. Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this. I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual. But here goes.

GET INTERNET ACCESS FROM JUNO! Juno offers FREE or PREMIUM Internet access for less! Join Juno today!  For your FREE software, visit: http://dl.www.juno.com/get/tagj. — For info about this service, see http://anon.twwells.com/help/ or e-mail:

Response:

Hiya, Here is a place you can visit too – http://home.intekom.com/asdira WELCOME HERE …..

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse.  It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.

Response:

Hi Cristie,     Looks like you did it right.  I look forward to getting to know you and I hope that asd will provide you some semblance of the support and insight that it has given me.  It’s a great community. trill

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse.  It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.

Response:

Jane!     I am very glad to see you posting again.  What’s up?  House the cabin? How about all those kids and grandkids?  And the potting?  How goes it with the potting?     Give us a Janedid update, why doncha?  You’ve been gone for so long… I’ve been missing you and missing you some more. trill

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello, Christie, and welcome. This is a good place to talk about stuff. I have learned a great deal and best of all, found people who understand what I’m feeling and talking about. I’m here. Glad you are too! jane I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse. It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.  —–  Posted via NewsOne.Net: Free (anonymous) Usenet News via the eb  —–   http://newsone.net/ — Free reading and anonymous posting to 60,000+ groups    NewsOne.Net prohibits users from posting spam.  If this or other posts made through NewsOne.Net violate posting guidelines, email

Response:

okay, my post just came thru to my newsreader and cracked my own self up at the way i spelled "how’s" in the sentence "House the cabin?"  And i remembered that when i wrote the question a couple of insiders argued about whether or not i should refer to the place as the house or the cabin. is it stupid to point out that im laughing at myself trrrill

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Jane!     I am very glad to see you posting again.  What’s up?  House the cabin? How about all those kids and grandkids?  And the potting?  How goes it with the potting?     Give us a Janedid update, why doncha?  You’ve been gone for so long… I’ve been missing you and missing you some more. trill Hello, Christie, and welcome. This is a good place to talk about stuff. I have learned a great deal and best of all, found people who understand what I’m feeling and talking about. I’m here. Glad you are too! jane I somehow found this site for support for DID’s.  I’m 54 and I’ve suffered greatly for many years from every disorder in the books.  I’ve taken myself to many kinds of therapists, none helped and I continued to get worse. It all came to a head when I developed a conversion disorder and that finally lead to the likelyhood of a dissociative disorder.  I’m getting therapy and just started hynotherapy.  I have trouble with figuring out how to find my way around the internet, but I’m craving some support groups and contact with people like me.  Before I go on (and on, like I usually do) I’ll wait and be sure there’s anyone out there reading this.  I have a feeling I’m doing this all wrong, as usual.  But here goes.  —–  Posted via NewsOne.Net: Free (anonymous) Usenet News via the eb  —–   http://newsone.net/ — Free reading and anonymous posting to 60,000+ groups    NewsOne.Net prohibits users from posting spam.  If this or other posts made through NewsOne.Net violate posting guidelines, email

Response:

Question:

In article <92gal8$v8…@nnrp1.deja.com>,   too_scatte…@my-deja.com wrote: > Perhaps I should also resign myself to living with a certain amount of > ambiguity.

The funny thing is that everyone lives with a large amount of ambiguity everyday, but they try not to think about it. Those of us forced to deal with it are maybe closer to reality in a way. Regards Angelo Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Response:

A completely wrong diagnosis would make you think "hey – that’s not me!" Process of ruling out the options. speaking of the classification of mental disorders. If you take a look at the book the "Mood Genes" there is a section about the history of the whole system.. if i remember correctly. the whole DSM thing only goes back to about the 60’s. And, borderline was only included for the first time as a personality disorder in, um, i think.. the DSM III. Not sure. Classification is for the purspose of organization. Its a tool. I don’t think you can ever classified any group of things completely.

Response:

In article <3A4AD44A.C47CA…@magma.ca>,   Dawn Black <ddbl…@magma.ca> wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -(snip) > I found that even when I was originally getting labels, it didn’t matter > unless they were the right one. No one, none of the doctors I saw, > understood that. Simply saying that I was suffering from depression was not > enough. I knew that wasn’t simply it. So, eventually I found a docotor who > actually admitted BPD was what she thought it was – although the others had > hinted at it. It was  a relief. It seemed to explain me a little better. > Ignorance of what is wrong will not let you get a better handle on things. > Once you recognize a problem, as they say, then you can tackle it. > But, i tend toward a scientific mind.. =)

It is good to have a scientific mind . I don’t think that a radically wrong label would help me get a handle on anything – but I think that a "near miss" might help. Speaking of having a scientific mind – I think that the writers of the DSM were correct to have so many NOS (not otherwise specified) categories. It was their way of acknowledging that their classification scheme is still incomplete. An interesting analogy is the case with viruses. They don’t really fit into the conventional classification of things into living and non-living. Most scientists seem to prefer this ambiguity rather than simply stipulating that viruses are alive. Perhaps I should also resign myself to living with a certain amount of ambiguity. -scattered Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Response:

> >Stop looking > > for labels.  Those that exist mean different things to different > > doctors:they are imprecise: they may be wrong, given our present > state of > > knowledge. > > Apparently, you want to live up or down to a label to make you feel > better. > To name something is to get a handle on it. In my case I feel that a > debatable handle is better than no handle at all. "Unnamable" is an > unsettling adjective which seems most appropriate to ghost stories. I > get tired of feeling like a ghost sometimes.

I found that even when I was originally getting labels, it didn’t matter unless they were the right one. No one, none of the doctors I saw, understood that. Simply saying that I was suffering from depression was not enough. I knew that wasn’t simply it. So, eventually I found a docotor who actually admitted BPD was what she thought it was – although the others had hinted at it. It was  a relief. It seemed to explain me a little better. Ignorance of what is wrong will not let you get a better handle on things. Once you recognize a problem, as they say, then you can tackle it. But, i tend toward a scientific mind.. =)

Response:

In article <977686207.13831.0.nnrp-07.c1edc…@news.demon.co.uk>,   "helen phillipps" <he…@proverbs.demon.co.uk> wrote: I smell a Troll! But I will answer anyway because I think there are some opinions here that are common amongst normals and it is good to refute them. > Too scattered: > Did you not know that psychiatry is still in the dark ages?  Stop > looking for labels.  Those that exist mean different things to > different doctors:they are imprecise: they may be wrong, given our > present state of knowledge.

Many us us are grateful for the meds provided by dark age psychiatrists we see. I would not be alive today if not for the meds that help to keep me stable. Given MY present state of knowledge I’ll keeping taking the pills – I suggest you do too > Apparently, you want to live up or down to a label to make you feel > better. Try reading some psychology books to ascertain how many > differing views exist about the same condition.

Those of us here who are living with these disorders are probably all too aware of the non-specificity of our dx. In fact it is rare to find anyone with a clear dx. However as several of us have recently commented it has *helped* us to have a dx – a label if you like – because the disorders that we have lead to a lot of confusion. Having a dx can help us to put our chaotic lives into some sort of perspective. In a way it doesn’t matter what the dx is, it’s the sense of perspective that it affords that we need. Even a wrong dx can help because it gives us something solid to bounce our symptoms off. Most of us have read plenty of psychology books thanks, and ain’t it great that there are so many different perspectives on the mind. It means we can choose one that works for us. > In any event, the thinking is that personality disorders are > untreatable.

Whose thinking? Yours? What is your agenda? Personally I find that the treatment I am receiving is very useful. Meds and therapy are helping me to not only stay alive, but to find some enjoyment in life. I am happy to make a recommendation if you would like… > Why not try getting on with life?

This is pure ignorance speaking. We do get on with our lives, it’s just that our lives are chaotic, miserable and almost unliveable (to the point where many of us kill ourselves or try to). The assumption is that we could just "pull ourselves together" and get on with life without all the "fuss". If this is what you believe then FUCK YOU and FUCK OFF out of here, because it is the no.1 unhelpful idea that normals communicate to us. Why don’t you try getting on with life? > Many medics/therapists etc are rip-off merchants

Agreed, I have met a few in my time. Most are sincere however and at least we know in advance what their agendas are likely to be – unlike you who are full of criticism but not offering anything useful in place of what you are against. I owe my life to medics and therpists – simple as that. Most of us here do. We all know they’re not perfect, but they’re better than the alternative – including all kinds of religious cults (and I happen to be a VERY religious man!) and ideological positions. Your message is harsh, negative, and unsupportive, and as such is out of keeping with the general quality of posts to this ng. We have enough problems without crusaders, of any type, trying out their little theories here thanks. If you have a PD or know someone that does, and you would like to share your experience and/or get a little support (because god knows we all need some), then stick around. Otherwise it would be more productive for all concerned that you take your opinions elsewhere. Regards Angelo Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Response:

Hi Helen,   Thanks for your interesting reply. I have several comments: > Did you not know that psychiatry is still in the dark ages?

That statement taken at face value seems simply false. Presumably you mean that the ignorance of psychiatry regarding how the mind works is analogous to the ignorance of the physical cosmos during the so-called dark ages. But physical science virtually didn’t exist during the dark ages. In particular – the great conceptual leap of using mathematics to systematically describe the cosmos hadn’t been taken yet (at least in any realm outside of astronomy). Psychiatry as it is currently practiced is an interesting blend of hard and soft science, as well as a great deal of debatable philosophy. A great many researchers have conducted careful, modest, controlled experiments or studies which have uncovered a lot of interesting phenomena. A better analogy might be that psychiatry now is like the physical sciences before Newton – a lot of promising leads (e.g. Kepler’s laws of plantetary motion) but no really satisfying theory tying it together. >Stop looking > for labels.  Those that exist mean different things to different > doctors:they are imprecise: they may be wrong, given our present state of > knowledge. > Apparently, you want to live up or down to a label to make you feel

better. To name something is to get a handle on it. In my case I feel that a debatable handle is better than no handle at all. "Unnamable" is an unsettling adjective which seems most appropriate to ghost stories. I get tired of feeling like a ghost sometimes. > Try reading some psychology books to ascertain how many differing views > exist about the same condition.

Been there – done that. Good advice by the way. If anything – I would extend it. Throw in a good dose of poetry, philosophy, theology and history. Visit some art museums. Listen to a variety of music. Anything which deals with the human condition is relevant. > In any event, the thinking is that personality disorders are untreatable. > Why not try getting on with life?

Is this the "dark ages" thinking that you are refering to? If so – why should I accept such an ignorant verdict? In any event – I though that I *was* getting on with my life. It’s not like I sit in a darkened room next to the telephone waiting for my p-doc to call up with a label. One of the ways that I try to get on with my life is to turn to the wide world of the internet to try to gain a small measure of self- understanding. Presumably you do too (else why are you in this newsgroup? Hopefully you are not a scientologist troll.) > Many medics/therapists etc are rip-off merchants

True – but, cynicism aside, many aren’t. I sometimes question my p- doc’s competence but on the whole find him to be a helpful human being. I’m sorry if your experience has been more negative. Take care now. -scattered Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Response:

In article <9169ke$89…@nnrp1.deja.com>,   too_scatte…@my-deja.com wrote:

Hi Scattered, I can’t help with specifics but I have noticed that many of here are, or were, confused about what our dx should be. For myself I have wondered about having Aspergers Syndrome which is like Autism, after hearing a documentary on the radio about a woman who has overcome her disability to become a college professor. I could relate so strongly to her experience that I thought I might have the same thing. I think it’s relatively common to have symptoms from a variety of pd’s. One website I found reckons "82% of borderlines have at least a second personality disorder". http://www.biologicalunhappiness.com/AskDoc/MxPersnl.htm The DSM characterises pds in a specific context and definitions are subject to change – ie it is not definitive and maybe you really don’t fit any of the catergories. There is also a PD NOS. I certainly found it useful to be dx’ed if only because it helped me to put my life, my depression and relationship difficulties into a bigger picture. Is this what you’re hoping for from a dx? Just wondering why you are desparate about it. Regards Angelo Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Response:

Too scattered: Did you not know that psychiatry is still in the dark ages?  Stop looking for labels.  Those that exist mean different things to different doctors:they are imprecise: they may be wrong, given our present state of knowledge. Apparently, you want to live up or down to a label to make you feel better. Try reading some psychology books to ascertain how many differing views exist about the same condition. In any event, the thinking is that personality disorders are untreatable. Why not try getting on with life? Many medics/therapists etc are rip-off merchants

Response:

too_scatte…@my-deja.com wrote: > Greetings, >    I have been seeing a p-doc since March of this year. Whenever I > tried to pin him down to a diagnosis he always seemed to hedge. He > first labeled me as suffering from atypical depression but has since > retreated to saying that I have a "depressive disorder, not otherwise > specified."

I don’t know if this is helpful, but I was diagnosed by four different mental health professionals differently: 1. Psychiatrist – dx’d me with major depression and deferred any Axis II disorder dx. 2. Clinical Psychologist – dx’d me with dysthmia and major depression (also noted that I had symptoms of several pd, but not enough to make a dx of an pd.) 3. Psychiatrist – major depression nos. 4. Psychiatrist – Borderline personality disorder (possible bipolar on top of BPD) And, this all in the last 6 months!!! Mainly, they never seem to dx on what is actually wrong some of the time – but what they think is the better dx to have. It was very fustrating for me to be told that all I was suffering from was depression – because it didn’t fit.. it didn’t explain my behaviour etc. I don’t know if that was helpful..  just so you know you aren’t alone. Now, I have an exam to go study for <sigh>

Response:

Greetings,    I have been seeing a p-doc since March of this year. Whenever I tried to pin him down to a diagnosis he always seemed to hedge. He first labeled me as suffering from atypical depression but has since retreated to saying that I have a "depressive disorder, not otherwise specified." He has used the phrase "autistic thinking" to describe my thought processes – but then adds that I am not autisitic, not even a highly functioning one. 21 years ago (the last time I saw a shrink) I was called schizoid – but my current p-doc says that while I have schizoid aspects, I am not schizoid. At one time my p-doc suggested that I had a dissociative disorder, but he has retreated from that. Yesterday I saw him again for maybe the 15th time (long, 1 hour sessions) and expressed my frustration with his lack of diagnostic clarity. He then told me point blank that I simply didn’t fit in *any* of the DSM diagnostic categories. I am clearly depressed, but not in a way that matches the named depressive disorders (which is why he has attached the NOS tag to my chart). He says that my depression is pretty clearly a symptom of some underlying personality disorder – but that I don’t match any of the criteria for a specific one. He said that some psychiatrists would diagnose me as having a "mixed personality disorder" but that he didn’t think such a diagnosis actually means anything. From the way he said it – I got the impression that he wouldn’t disagree with a psychiatrist who would so diagnose me, but that he just has a semantic disagreement about the usefulness of the term. I am somewhat desperate for a label – so I thus diagnose myself as having a "mixed personality disorder." Now my question is – has anybody else here had that label thrown at them, and does such a label actually mean anything? -scattered Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Response:

Question:

Have someone seen the new comedy whith Jim Carrey Is it funny for us too? Iwe heard that they have tried to stop the film in USA and in Sweden bequase they make fun of us! But I will see it . bequace im a fan of Jim Carrie and I think I will like the movie Peter

Response:

I’ve written the UK release date in my diary (call me sad!!) – I want to see it.   Jim Carey is very funny and laughter is the best medicine.   Who knows, the film might actually make people think about the issue of mental illness rather than simply ignoring it.   And if the film is actually good then that is a big bonus Tony http://www.theloonybin.fsbusiness.co.uk "Peter thuresson" <zcx4…@tninet.se> wrote in message

news:8lslhq$2t4$1@cubacola.tninet.se… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Have someone seen the new comedy whith Jim Carrey > Is it funny for us too? > Iwe heard that they have tried to stop the film in USA and in Sweden > bequase they make fun of us! > But I will see it . bequace im a fan of Jim Carrie and I think I will like > the movie > Peter

Response:

They make the mistake of calling Dissociative Identity Disorder, Schizophrenia.  Carrey’s characer has DID (or otherwise known as multiple personality disorder)…a common mistake in the media.  He does not have Schizophrenia. –Jeni "Peter thuresson" <zcx4…@tninet.se> wrote in message

news:8lslhq$2t4$1@cubacola.tninet.se… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Have someone seen the new comedy whith Jim Carrey > Is it funny for us too? > Iwe heard that they have tried to stop the film in USA and in Sweden > bequase they make fun of us! > But I will see it . bequace im a fan of Jim Carrie and I think I will like > the movie > Peter

Response:

I haven’t seen it but my sister and her boyfriend did.  They said it was very funny and there was very little focus on Jim’s supposed mental health problem.  What bugs me most about the movie is that they say Jim’s character has schizophrenia when it’s obvious he has multiple personality disorder (MPD).  That’s misinformation at its worst.  Something we definitely don’t need in the area of mental health. Frank. Peter thuresson <zcx4…@tninet.se> wrote in message

news:8lslhq$2t4$1@cubacola.tninet.se… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Have someone seen the new comedy whith Jim Carrey > Is it funny for us too? > Iwe heard that they have tried to stop the film in USA and in Sweden > bequase they make fun of us! > But I will see it . bequace im a fan of Jim Carrie and I think I will like > the movie > Peter

Response:

>Have someone seen the new comedy whith Jim Carrey >Is it funny for us too? >Iwe heard that they have tried to stop the film in USA and in Sweden >bequase they make fun of us! >But I will see it . bequace im a fan of Jim Carrie and I think I will like >the movie

I thought the movie was about multiple personality disorder. Maybe not…

Response:

Am I the only one who feels that having to look at Jim Carry’s face even for one second is like falling in Dog Poop, and landing on it with your mouth? sp In article <8lsne0$1p…@news8.svr.pol.co.uk>, Vicky and Tony <vickyandtony@STICK_YOUR_SPAM_UP_YOUR_ARSE_theloonybin.fsbusiness.co.uk> – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text - wrote: > I’ve written the UK release date in my diary (call me sad!!) – I want to see > it.   Jim Carey is very funny and laughter is the best medicine.   Who > knows, the film might actually make people think about the issue of mental > illness rather than simply ignoring it.   And if the film is actually good > then that is a big bonus > Tony > http://www.theloonybin.fsbusiness.co.uk > "Peter thuresson" <zcx4…@tninet.se> wrote in message > news:8lslhq$2t4$1@cubacola.tninet.se… > > Have someone seen the new comedy whith Jim Carrey > > Is it funny for us too? > > Iwe heard that they have tried to stop the film in USA and in Sweden > > bequase they make fun of us! > > But I will see it . bequace im a fan of Jim Carrie and I think I will like > > the movie > > Peter

Response:

Psyk5150 a

Question:

dont waste your money….rent it later!  i love jim carrey but overall imho….very dissapointing.    there goes ten dollars…sheesh….. smurfette                              "death is not the greatest loss in life,                the greatest loss is what dies inside of us while we’re alive"                                                        -oliver wendell holmes

Response:

I was pretty unimpressed by the film.  I expected slapstick comedy… I also expected a bit of crudity, but this film went for shock value most of all because it’s, like the trendy thing to do… well, if pornographic references every other scene squick you, buy a ticket, see the first twenty minutes which are genuine slapstick and I laughed really hard, then walk out and get your money back Adagio dont waste your money….rent it later!  i love jim carrey but overall imho….very dissapointing.    there goes ten dollars…sheesh….. smurfette                             "death is not the greatest loss in life,               the greatest loss is what dies inside of us while we’re alive"                                                       -oliver wendell holmes

– Pet Peeve no. 216: People who verb nouns.

Response:

there goes ten dollars…sheesh…..

10 dollars??  damn….a little entertainment is expensive these days.

Response:

big apple..one price all day i learned today!  only in new york city huh?

Response:

It irks me no end when Hollywood and the media use schizophrenia and "multiple personality" interchangeably.  It perpetuates a myth and stereotype that people with either schizophrenia or dissociative disorder hate.  I know it’s "just a movie" intended to be funny – but movies usually are funny because there’s supposedly an element of truth in it that people can laugh at. I was so disgusted with the pornographic stuff in it that I completely forgot that the above was the reason I went to see it. Adagio Here’s the reason I didn’t like it. They kept refering to him as having Delusional schizophrenia with tendencies toward paranoid narcisstic rage, when in actuality he suffered from Dissociative Identity Disorder(formerly Multiple Personality Disorder) One’s a psychosis, the other a neurosis. It was completely clinically inacurrate. So while I thought Jim was funny, because I always do, it really frustrated me with it’s lack of research. I’m sorry for being a nerd. -Piper

– Pet Peeve no. 216: People who verb nouns.

Response:

your cool! no nerd! IM Me YO YO YOU OYO YO love, smurfette                              "death is not the greatest loss in life,                the greatest loss is what dies inside of us while we’re alive"                                                        -oliver wendell holmes

Response:

Oh I won’t waste my money what so ever on this movie.  I don’t like how it is portraying mental illness.  Though, I’m not suprised with knowing who directed it.  Yuck!     Ears   Fall seven times, stand up eight. -Japanese Proverb

Response:

Here’s the reason I didn’t like it. They kept refering to him as having Delusional schizophrenia with tendencies toward paranoid narcisstic rage, when in actuality he suffered from Dissociative Identity Disorder(formerly Multiple Personality Disorder) One’s a psychosis, the other a neurosis. It was completely clinically inacurrate. So while I thought Jim was funny, because I always do, it really frustrated me with it’s lack of research. I’m sorry for being a nerd. -Piper

Response:

Question:

Look into books by the late Father Malachi Martin.  He was an exorcist for many years.

Response:

I think I know what you are saying. There are times when I am compelled to act in a way that lacks compassion, such as during mixed episodes, it is almost as if I were being controlled by a demon; afterwards I am often unaware of my actions and very disturbed by them. Often during episodes I react like my abusers. I suffered from dissociative fugues as well before taking medication; similarly, Anne Sexton was helped by Thorazine I believe, though she also appeared borderline. Some believe that everything that one experiences is the result of karma, or that there are no victims. . . just a thought. . . Gabriel * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!

Response:

Hey stevo… I might suggest you looking up some information on Dissociative Disorder or DID/MPD.  Its very interesting.  I don’t have any urls for you though, maybe Lynda does. Linda – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Does anybody have any thoughts on possession?I don’t think I mean the supernatural sense(I don’t really believe in that though I believe in God) but maybe a part of ones self is unleashed for a short while and completely dominates all other parts.I recently had an experience  like this and though at the time I thought I was enjoying it I now feel very defiled.I feel as if I invited something in to my soul through my actions.Others involved do not see it like that but I can’t help it. Anybody shed any light?. Steve

Response:

Does anybody have any thoughts on possession?I don’t think I mean the supernatural sense(I don’t really believe in that though I believe in God) but maybe a part of ones self is unleashed for a short while and completely dominates all other parts.

OOHH!  BADBADBAD!!!  I have a bad part takes over – don’t like it at all! It takes me by surprise too.  And then I am not in control of the body but I can still look out the eyes sometimes, or it seems like I am out of my body observing.  If I don’t pay attention I miss things that are happening and it’s like ZAP! I’m somewhere else.  Usually another part I can talk to will take over but she is young either young or the moody one and does not handle things well.  But then I get back together finally.  I have found that Seroquel is a great drug that helps keep me together.  I don’t know if that means that it is part of a psychosis or what, but it fits into the dissociative spectrum rather nicely also so I don’t knw the difference or what it is.  There are many thoughts on this, including the possession theory.  But I, like you, feel that it is another part of myself that takes over. I recently had an experience  like this and though at the time I thought I was enjoying it I now feel very defiled.I feel as if I invited something in to my soul through my actions.Others involved do not see it like that but I can’t help it. Anybody shed any light?.

Could you me more specific about what happened?  I don’t understand the part of where you "invited" something in, and others were involved.  Was it part of some type of ritual, or did it just happen? Sasha – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Steve

Response:

I saw a show recently on near death experiences.  They can duplicate the experience in the mind with drugs and all sorts of things.  They have even found that certain mental illnesses have the same type of experiences as near death. What both of you describe are right in line with that theory.  It is a problem with the communication in the brain.  The brain gets over loaded with stimuli and it wigs out and you have hallucinations and the feeling of being outside your body. They dont have many treatments for it–but are working on it.  One day we will know exactly how this works and better meds will be available. But for now, all we have are anti-psychotics. FWIW, Nancy permanently in the ether: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Does anybody have any thoughts on possession?I don’t think I mean the supernatural sense(I don’t really believe in that though I believe in God) but maybe a part of ones self is unleashed for a short while and completely dominates all other parts. OOHH!  BADBADBAD!!!  I have a bad part takes over – don’t like it at all! It takes me by surprise too.  And then I am not in control of the body but I can still look out the eyes sometimes, or it seems like I am out of my body observing.  If I don’t pay attention I miss things that are happening and it’s like ZAP! I’m somewhere else.  Usually another part I can talk to will take over but she is young either young or the moody one and does not handle things well.  But then I get back together finally.  I have found that Seroquel is a great drug that helps keep me together.  I don’t know if that means that it is part of a psychosis or what, but it fits into the dissociative spectrum rather nicely also so I don’t knw the difference or what it is.  There are many thoughts on this, including the possession theory.  But I, like you, feel that it is another part of myself that takes over. I recently had an experience  like this and though at the time I thought I was enjoying it I now feel very defiled.I feel as if I invited something in to my soul through my actions.Others involved do not see it like that but I can’t help it. Anybody shed any light?. Could you me more specific about what happened?  I don’t understand the part of where you "invited" something in, and others were involved.  Was it part of some type of ritual, or did it just happen? Sasha Steve

Response:

Hi, Steve. I am diagnosed MPD/DID as well as bipolar. I was dx’d bipolar first, in 1988. Then Dx’d MPD in 1994. I experience the same thing that you do, and attribute that to my multiplicity. (… in a way…) Although some of ‘us’ (my inside people) experience it as possession and are very scared of it.  I (the host) have to come up with some rational, objective explanation and the only one I can find is the multiplicity. Mary Sunshine – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Does anybody have any thoughts on possession?I don’t think I mean the supernatural sense(I don’t really believe in that though I believe in God) but maybe a part of ones self is unleashed for a short while and completely dominates all other parts.I recently had an experience  like this and though at the time I thought I was enjoying it I now feel very defiled.I feel as if I invited something in to my soul through my actions.Others involved do not see it like that but I can’t help it. Anybody shed any light?. Steve

Response:

Does anybody have any thoughts on possession?I don’t think I mean the supernatural sense(I don’t really believe in that though I believe in God) but maybe a part of ones self is unleashed for a short while and completely dominates all other parts.I recently had an experience  like this and though at the time I thought I was enjoying it I now feel very defiled.I feel as if I invited something in to my soul through my actions.Others involved do not see it like that but I can’t help it. Anybody shed any light?. Steve

Response:

Question:

Does anybody find that they zone out, their mind wanders, and they sometimes feel half-conscious during social situations?  This has become a problem for me during business meetings.  I mean, maybe it’s just because they’re boring, but I realize that I have gone into this state occasionally for years.  I never thought of it as self-defense, but my therapist suggests that it could easily be. Also, does anybody know anything about fugue states?  (I think this is usually a part of a dissociative disorder, not my problem, luckily.) Thanks, Kate Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.

Response:

In article <87fdat$o7…@nnrp1.deja.com>,   confusion_h…@my-deja.com wrote: > Does anybody find that they zone out, their mind wanders, and they > sometimes feel half-conscious during social situations?  This has become > a problem for me during business meetings.  I mean, maybe it’s just > because they’re boring, but I realize that I have gone into this state > occasionally for years.  I never thought of it as self-defense, but my > therapist suggests that it could easily be.

Yeah, I zone out quite a bit, especially when I’m listening to someone ramble on and on and on. The kind of person who just wants to talk, but doesn’t really want to have a conversation.  If I’m not really involved with what’s being discussed, my mind will wander.  I also drift off at work too.  I’ll be staring at my computer screen and I’ll be thinking about anything but what I’m supposed to be doing.  I think it’s kind of a self defense too, as I often day-dream about things I’d rather be doing! > Also, does anybody know anything about fugue states?  (I think this is > usually a part of a dissociative disorder, not my problem, luckily.)

A fugue state is where a person suddenly picks up and takes off, often assuming an entirely different identity.  It could last as briefly as a couple of hours or last as long as months.  And usually when the person snaps out of it, he or she doesn’t even remember the events that took place while in the alternate identity.  It’s really rare and is usually set off by some major period of psychological stress (marital conflict, military combat, etc). At least I wasn’t daydreaming during my psychology classes when I was in college! Brian > Thanks, > Kate > Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ > Before you buy.

Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.

Response:

Question:

I call that an hallucination. Being aware that I am hallucinating means that I am not being deluded by illusions. any help?

Risperdol? <grin    Ralph

Response:

Delusional is any thought or emotion that goes against what you know is true. For example, the belief that the whole world is against you is a delusional thought, unless you have evidence that would stand up in a court of law. The fear of "the system" rather than specvific individuals is another form of delusion. Seeing or hearing things that are not there is called halusinations. (My spelling is called lazy <grin)       Ralph

Response:

I call that an hallucination. Being aware that I am hallucinating means that I am not being deluded by illusions. any help? Isabel – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Isn’t delusional when that which you believe you see is in fact something other than which you are seeing. Hi Isabel. My question would then be this: Can you say to yourself, I can NOT be seeing this, this CAN NOT be real while in fact you are sure that you are seeing/feeling/believing something and that something is *at odds* with what you know should be reality? Would it still be classed as delusional? or would neurotic better fit?? Tristana

Response:

Has someone brought a cat into the house? I swear mice like to live dangerously. Isabel.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Isabel. My question would then be this: Can you say to yourself, I can NOT be seeing this, this CAN NOT be real while in fact you are sure that you are seeing/feeling/believing something and that something is *at odds* with what you know should be reality? Would it still be classed as delusional? or would neurotic better fit?? Tristana Interesting question.  During a particularly difficult period last fall I walked into my bathroom and saw a mouse cowering in the corner of the room. Not just a glimpse of it either — I saw it leap, heard it squeak, then run into another room, at which point I myself walked into the room and closed the door.  I was never able to see or hear that mouse again, or detect its presence in any way.  I couldn’t find a hole or other way the mouse could use to leave.  To this day I am still not sure whether there was a mouse there or not. Now, I do know that mice in general can squeeze into some pretty small openings, but it’s still unsettling, especially since I don’t think that the building has a mouse problem (it’s a fairly new building, dating from late 60s or early 70s).  What’s more odd, though, is that I was so quick to accept the possibility that I could have had that delusion/hallucination. In my case it’s more like "there is a possibility that it WAS there, but then again there was a possibility that it WASN’T". Cheers, TAE

Response:

I hate to say it, but unfortunately, probably.  It can also be labeled as naive, or blind, or just stupidly in love. (that last one would  be me) -judy – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana

Response:

Glad to hear it honey, you hang in there! I for one will remain delusional…. -judy – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I hate to say it, but unfortunately, probably.  It can also be labeled as naive, or blind, or just stupidly in love. (that last one would  be me) -judy if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana actually, the delusions I have been having had nothing to do with love it was spooky stuff that I didn’t want to mention here for fear of triggering someone. Today, is the first day I have felt relatively normal again. Tristana

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I hate to say it, but unfortunately, probably.  It can also be labeled as naive, or blind, or just stupidly in love. (that last one would  be me) -judy if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana

actually, the delusions I have been having had nothing to do with love it was spooky stuff that I didn’t want to mention here for fear of triggering someone. Today, is the first day I have felt relatively normal again. Tristana

Response:

Isn’t delusional when that which you believe you see is in fact something other than which you are seeing.

Hi Isabel. My question would then be this: Can you say to yourself, I can NOT be seeing this, this CAN NOT be real while in fact you are sure that you are seeing/feeling/believing something and that something is *at odds* with what you know should be reality? Would it still be classed as delusional? or would neurotic better fit?? Tristana

Response:

Hi Isabel. My question would then be this: Can you say to yourself, I can NOT be seeing this, this CAN NOT be real while in fact you are sure that you are seeing/feeling/believing something and that something is *at odds* with what you know should be reality? Would it still be classed as delusional? or would neurotic better fit?? Tristana

Interesting question.  During a particularly difficult period last fall I walked into my bathroom and saw a mouse cowering in the corner of the room. Not just a glimpse of it either — I saw it leap, heard it squeak, then run into another room, at which point I myself walked into the room and closed the door.  I was never able to see or hear that mouse again, or detect its presence in any way.  I couldn’t find a hole or other way the mouse could use to leave.  To this day I am still not sure whether there was a mouse there or not. Now, I do know that mice in general can squeeze into some pretty small openings, but it’s still unsettling, especially since I don’t think that the building has a mouse problem (it’s a fairly new building, dating from late 60s or early 70s).  What’s more odd, though, is that I was so quick to accept the possibility that I could have had that delusion/hallucination. In my case it’s more like "there is a possibility that it WAS there, but then again there was a possibility that it WASN’T". Cheers, TAE

Response:

Get a cat. I use to see streaks running across the room, thought I was losing it, started to think maybe they were right about doing drugs, then my cat started catching mice. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Interesting question.  During a particularly difficult period last fall I walked into my bathroom and saw a mouse cowering in the corner of the room. Not just a glimpse of it either — I saw it leap, heard it squeak, then run into another room, at which point I myself walked into the room and closed the door.  I was never able to see or hear that mouse again, or detect its presence in any way.  I couldn’t find a hole or other way the mouse could use to leave.  To this day I am still not sure whether there was a mouse there or not.

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Isn’t delusional when that which you believe you see is in fact something other than which you are seeing. A recent example : saw illustration of a barbecue in hardware store’s catalogue, believed myself to see round burners and thought this could replace the ancient stove just discarded. When the barbecue was delivered, and also when I next looked at the catalogue I *now* perceive that the burners differ from my earlier belief. I now have a barbecue that I think I am less likely to use. Can only rationalise this by believing that my subconscious knows something that I don’t – eg. an impending social life, but then again this belief could be delusional, but without it I would probably not have the faith or the hope to be bothered carrying on. Isabel – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I hate to say it, but unfortunately, probably.  It can also be labeled as naive, or blind, or just stupidly in love. (that last one would  be me) -judy if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana

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if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana That sounds like one of three things: Hope, Faith, or Love. <grin (all three of which are somewhat delusionsal) <grinning even more All three are also necessary to life as we know it. Hugs, Ralph

<teeheeeeee Ralph!! in my miss pollyanna way, the delusion would then be the *disbelief* in these things. *hugs* backatcha Tristana

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if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana

That sounds like one of three things: Hope, Faith, or Love. <grin (all three of which are somewhat delusionsal) <grinning even more All three are also necessary to life as we know it. Hugs, Ralph

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if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional? Tristana

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if you believe something with all your heart that you normally do not believe, and you are desperately trying to rationalize the belief somehow..does that count as delusional?

From what I’ve heard and experienced, if you are delusional you do not need to rationalize your beliefs, you consider them perfectly rational, even though others don’t.  But I seem to recall also having heard that people could convince you by rationalization, that what you believe isn’t true, but you believe it anyway, but I don’t know how that scenario would go.  My episodes are brief, and afterwards, its like I can’t believe I was thinking that and it seemed perfectly rational to me then (as I was driving wrecklessly while screaming, or running out into traffic, or thinking I was invisible, etc…).  Also my experience is a dissociative disorder depending upon which psych camp anyone wishes to believe.  It could be (and this is what I believe) that a few of my alters are delusional/psychotic, and the other camp would believe that I am just more delusional/psychotic for believing I have alter personalities.  I’m getting way off track here, so anyone else have any ideas? If you don’t mind my asking, what delusion are you speaking of? Or is it just a general question?  And which mood do you mean, any? Sasha – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Tristana

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